"Phil Hellmuth has got a weird look on his face, like a...shy ostrich who's looking to mate"
Gabe Kaplan - High Stakes Poker Season 4 Episode 8 - www.pokertube.com
Wednesday, October 17, 2007
Saturday, October 13, 2007
Crazy Dayz
Had such a surreal experience today that i would like to share. First of all let me say cheers to the comments on the last post. I hope you all know that i realise that these clowns are the money donators long term and that we need them. However in a tournament situation i find it difficult to think like that, given that i am out and they are in with my chips and I have very little chance of seeing the little fookers again! Seriously though, it was written immediately after busting, red faced, and like someone pointed out was very much a vent post.
So to today. Yesterday my Dad and his wife, who are currently in Europe from their home in Canada, arrived back from Italy where they had been visiting family in and around Rome. This meant that i welcomed them back to my London pad so they could stay the night before heading off to Devon today. I was presented with pasta, wine, prosciutto and a monster block of Parmesan so all was good in the world. Oh yeah!! I was also given a "Three Titty Cookie". When they told me they had brought a "Three Titty Cookie" i was like "Ha ha, yeah, good one. That's obviously one of those things that gets lost in translation. Means one thing here which is rude and another thing there which isn't rude" etc etc. They were my thoughts until after dinner i was given a white bag and pulled out what can only be described as a gingerbread woman (although it turned out she was more just bread than ginger bread) and there for all to see in the centre of her chest were a row of 3 breaded breasts! Complete with breaded nipples!!!! I couldn't believe it and it cracked me up. I just tried to google image a picture for you but can't find one. I suggest you try to find one by using the google image search engine and the term "three titty cookie", to see the most bizarre array of breasts, cocks and flour based baked confectionery you are ever likely to see!!
So we had a good evening and they planned to leave today after i took them out and they treated me to lunch somewhere posh. We had to make a stop first though at a branch of Europcar to sort out some detail regarding their car. They had requested a Golf TDI but had been given a Jetta. In the hurry to get back from the airport last night they had paid for the deposit on the wrong credit card. The correct card gives them travel insurance which covers motoring abroad. Given that they were to make a longish journey today, they wanted to get it sorted out before they left.
So we set off to Putney. Europcar is right by the station at Putney Bridge. Except when we got there we had come round the wrong way and were now facing a "emergency only" one way road. This short narrow road had a bollard either end and the one nearest us was folded down, whilst the one at the other end remained up. I suggested we drive over the one that was laying down, as nothing could come the other way, to pull up in front of their office, where the door was clearly open, nip in and ask the best way to their car park. This seemed sensible given that the road we came in on was the exit road for all the double decker buses from the train/bus station and this would get us out of the way. So at about 3 miles an hour we pulled towards this bollard.
All of a sudden, without the faintest hint of a scrape, bang or anything, there was a huge bang. My ears shot through with a piercing ring as a result of the noise. I could hardly see anything as the car was full of smoke. It was such a surreal vision my description really doesn't do it justice. My dad shouted for us to get out of the car. He thought the car was going to blow up. It became almost immediately clear that there was nothing wrong with the engine. What had happened, for a reason that still remains unclear was that the airbags had suddenly deployed. Filling the car with their foul smelling talc-like smoke. The air bag had smacked me in the chest and my dad was bleeding from his arm where it had caught him. Looking at the picture in my minds eye now it was like something out of a war movie. Like we just got bombed or something. Lol. It did actually make me think about the war. I was pretty shaken up and my dad was actually worse. How the hell must these guys and girls in the desert cope with it constantly? Fookin scary.
Anyways, we went into Europcar and the guy, despite having been closed for half an hour already, stayed and sorted us out with a RAC rescue. After a lengthy wait and dealing with all the cocks that stopped every 2 minutes to hear us recount the tale of "What happened?" we were picked up. My dad and his good lady were taken to Heathrow where they were given a free upgrade and told that the car will be fully investigated. There seems to be no blame aimed at us, which is correct, but i am going to contact VW and see if i can get a free car! (or a t-shirt) My head hurts a lot and my right ear is right fucked but i am sure it will be okay and the two of them made it safely to Devon.
The last time i was in an incident like this was about a year ago. A group of "the lads" got in an old, small, "Nova" style car and headed off ooop north, home to a house party in Leeds. No sooner had we opened our beers (not the driver) and made it onto the motorway out of London, pulled nicely into te fast lane when BANG. Huge bang and suddenly strangely dark inside the car. It turned out they had filled up before we left and checked the oil and water. When we picked up speed on the motorway the air pressure was too much for the bonnet that had not been closed properly. The bonnet flew up and, catching the wind, blew back and bent right over, smashing and attaching itself to the windscreen blocking the drivers view completely. My fast thinking companion lowered himself in his chair so he could see under the small arch of windscreen that was left visible below the curve of the bonnet whilst slowly breaking. The car behind us knew something was wrong and slowed right down also. We eventually stopped on the fast lane of the motorway and got out, some still with Carlsberg in hand to assess the damage. Eventually we got it off the road and once the driver had shaken it off, we resumed thoughts of how to get to Leeds. We called bus, train and plane companies; no dice. The rescue dude said that a replacement was a no go for at least 24 hours. In the end we came to the un-unanimous agreement that we should drive it home smashed windscreen and all as that was where the car's insurance was registered. 200 miles with a fully shattered windscreen later, we arrived at their house, parked the car and got straight in another one to go to the party. That was the night the Police turned up after a neighbour had come round with a baseball bat....but that's another story....
What a day. It's no wonder i never go outside
So to today. Yesterday my Dad and his wife, who are currently in Europe from their home in Canada, arrived back from Italy where they had been visiting family in and around Rome. This meant that i welcomed them back to my London pad so they could stay the night before heading off to Devon today. I was presented with pasta, wine, prosciutto and a monster block of Parmesan so all was good in the world. Oh yeah!! I was also given a "Three Titty Cookie". When they told me they had brought a "Three Titty Cookie" i was like "Ha ha, yeah, good one. That's obviously one of those things that gets lost in translation. Means one thing here which is rude and another thing there which isn't rude" etc etc. They were my thoughts until after dinner i was given a white bag and pulled out what can only be described as a gingerbread woman (although it turned out she was more just bread than ginger bread) and there for all to see in the centre of her chest were a row of 3 breaded breasts! Complete with breaded nipples!!!! I couldn't believe it and it cracked me up. I just tried to google image a picture for you but can't find one. I suggest you try to find one by using the google image search engine and the term "three titty cookie", to see the most bizarre array of breasts, cocks and flour based baked confectionery you are ever likely to see!!
So we had a good evening and they planned to leave today after i took them out and they treated me to lunch somewhere posh. We had to make a stop first though at a branch of Europcar to sort out some detail regarding their car. They had requested a Golf TDI but had been given a Jetta. In the hurry to get back from the airport last night they had paid for the deposit on the wrong credit card. The correct card gives them travel insurance which covers motoring abroad. Given that they were to make a longish journey today, they wanted to get it sorted out before they left.
So we set off to Putney. Europcar is right by the station at Putney Bridge. Except when we got there we had come round the wrong way and were now facing a "emergency only" one way road. This short narrow road had a bollard either end and the one nearest us was folded down, whilst the one at the other end remained up. I suggested we drive over the one that was laying down, as nothing could come the other way, to pull up in front of their office, where the door was clearly open, nip in and ask the best way to their car park. This seemed sensible given that the road we came in on was the exit road for all the double decker buses from the train/bus station and this would get us out of the way. So at about 3 miles an hour we pulled towards this bollard.
All of a sudden, without the faintest hint of a scrape, bang or anything, there was a huge bang. My ears shot through with a piercing ring as a result of the noise. I could hardly see anything as the car was full of smoke. It was such a surreal vision my description really doesn't do it justice. My dad shouted for us to get out of the car. He thought the car was going to blow up. It became almost immediately clear that there was nothing wrong with the engine. What had happened, for a reason that still remains unclear was that the airbags had suddenly deployed. Filling the car with their foul smelling talc-like smoke. The air bag had smacked me in the chest and my dad was bleeding from his arm where it had caught him. Looking at the picture in my minds eye now it was like something out of a war movie. Like we just got bombed or something. Lol. It did actually make me think about the war. I was pretty shaken up and my dad was actually worse. How the hell must these guys and girls in the desert cope with it constantly? Fookin scary.
Anyways, we went into Europcar and the guy, despite having been closed for half an hour already, stayed and sorted us out with a RAC rescue. After a lengthy wait and dealing with all the cocks that stopped every 2 minutes to hear us recount the tale of "What happened?" we were picked up. My dad and his good lady were taken to Heathrow where they were given a free upgrade and told that the car will be fully investigated. There seems to be no blame aimed at us, which is correct, but i am going to contact VW and see if i can get a free car! (or a t-shirt) My head hurts a lot and my right ear is right fucked but i am sure it will be okay and the two of them made it safely to Devon.
The last time i was in an incident like this was about a year ago. A group of "the lads" got in an old, small, "Nova" style car and headed off ooop north, home to a house party in Leeds. No sooner had we opened our beers (not the driver) and made it onto the motorway out of London, pulled nicely into te fast lane when BANG. Huge bang and suddenly strangely dark inside the car. It turned out they had filled up before we left and checked the oil and water. When we picked up speed on the motorway the air pressure was too much for the bonnet that had not been closed properly. The bonnet flew up and, catching the wind, blew back and bent right over, smashing and attaching itself to the windscreen blocking the drivers view completely. My fast thinking companion lowered himself in his chair so he could see under the small arch of windscreen that was left visible below the curve of the bonnet whilst slowly breaking. The car behind us knew something was wrong and slowed right down also. We eventually stopped on the fast lane of the motorway and got out, some still with Carlsberg in hand to assess the damage. Eventually we got it off the road and once the driver had shaken it off, we resumed thoughts of how to get to Leeds. We called bus, train and plane companies; no dice. The rescue dude said that a replacement was a no go for at least 24 hours. In the end we came to the un-unanimous agreement that we should drive it home smashed windscreen and all as that was where the car's insurance was registered. 200 miles with a fully shattered windscreen later, we arrived at their house, parked the car and got straight in another one to go to the party. That was the night the Police turned up after a neighbour had come round with a baseball bat....but that's another story....
What a day. It's no wonder i never go outside
Thursday, October 11, 2007
Now i'm steamed
I lost everything on Stars too. Went out bought stuff for the house. Cleaned up. Had a long shower and came back refreshed and played... exactly the same. What a donkey. The only saving grace was the fact that i was second in a 4.40./ 180. Then i just ran into the biggest army of donkeys i have ever witnessed in my life. I have seen some donkeys, but this was summink else! As you should know i rarely blame things on other people but when you saw these plays....Oh my god my face is actually red hot!!
I raised in first position as the big stack and AK of hearts. A numpty who had just limped and reraised from first position with 22, shoved all in. I knew i was calling. I made a straight with the board's 2345. Unfortunately he had made the play with 66 so has a higher straight. I tell him i gave him the benefit of the doubt with the 22 as it may have been a clever play that went wrong. "Now though", i tell him, "i am convinced you are an idiot". He says "i put you on AK". Ahahahahahah. This is fucking hilarious. This, translated from a low limit player, means; "i hoped you had AK as that is all i stood a chance against FOR ALL MY CHIPS". He says he wanted chips for the final table and could i blame him. I said yes. With 66 and my stack, for all your chips, with half the table still to act. Yes i could blame him. Who the fuck else was i expected to blame?? The irony of this of course was that this put him on 28k, and by the FT he had 18k and had dripped 1/3 of his stack by playing like a cunt.
Later some dude raises the cutoff minus 1 with 37off suit and calls the short stacks reraise all in. He then calls my raise from his bb. I have the button and 33. The flop is 89A he shoves. I am pretty sure he doesn't have it but i don't need to be a hero. He shows me Q6 off suit. I then lay into him. He asks me what my biggest cash is. I say "tourneys? not much, 500 or so". He says "well i regularly cash for 500+ so stop teaching", or something retarded. I say i am not teaching but he could fucking do with some lessons. Cock. I check his Sharkscope - 600 games - minus 30% ROI - minus $1k profit. OK that's his sit and go results and his graph looks like a ski slope. From the top looking down of course. I then check his OPR, tournament results. 35 tournaments. Loads of $1 entries. 3 cashes in 35 games. Biggest $9. Ha! What a plum.
Later I raise ep, whilst harping onto this cunt about bad play and the shot stack calls all in. Ok. He has 56 off suit. I laugh. Then he makes quad 5's on the turn. I stop laughing.
What the fuck is that?? Do people honestly pay no attention to the hands that are played and what i am saying about playing good cards vurses spastics? Even if they do, how is 56 ever a good call. Is he hoping i raise 34. Ha! Anyway this piece of shit made it to the final table.
Any way i go card dead and see 84 off suit and just drip blinds and antes. We got to the final table and i have 10bb's and shove AJ in early. I know i am fucked when i am insta called in the seat to my left. He has AK. What cracks me up though (not at all actually) is the fact that Mr Call 56, calls after the shove and the insta call. He calls all in again with QT suited. AND MAKES 2 PAIR TO TAKE THE MAIN POT.
Fuck off
I raised in first position as the big stack and AK of hearts. A numpty who had just limped and reraised from first position with 22, shoved all in. I knew i was calling. I made a straight with the board's 2345. Unfortunately he had made the play with 66 so has a higher straight. I tell him i gave him the benefit of the doubt with the 22 as it may have been a clever play that went wrong. "Now though", i tell him, "i am convinced you are an idiot". He says "i put you on AK". Ahahahahahah. This is fucking hilarious. This, translated from a low limit player, means; "i hoped you had AK as that is all i stood a chance against FOR ALL MY CHIPS". He says he wanted chips for the final table and could i blame him. I said yes. With 66 and my stack, for all your chips, with half the table still to act. Yes i could blame him. Who the fuck else was i expected to blame?? The irony of this of course was that this put him on 28k, and by the FT he had 18k and had dripped 1/3 of his stack by playing like a cunt.
Later some dude raises the cutoff minus 1 with 37off suit and calls the short stacks reraise all in. He then calls my raise from his bb. I have the button and 33. The flop is 89A he shoves. I am pretty sure he doesn't have it but i don't need to be a hero. He shows me Q6 off suit. I then lay into him. He asks me what my biggest cash is. I say "tourneys? not much, 500 or so". He says "well i regularly cash for 500+ so stop teaching", or something retarded. I say i am not teaching but he could fucking do with some lessons. Cock. I check his Sharkscope - 600 games - minus 30% ROI - minus $1k profit. OK that's his sit and go results and his graph looks like a ski slope. From the top looking down of course. I then check his OPR, tournament results. 35 tournaments. Loads of $1 entries. 3 cashes in 35 games. Biggest $9. Ha! What a plum.
Later I raise ep, whilst harping onto this cunt about bad play and the shot stack calls all in. Ok. He has 56 off suit. I laugh. Then he makes quad 5's on the turn. I stop laughing.
What the fuck is that?? Do people honestly pay no attention to the hands that are played and what i am saying about playing good cards vurses spastics? Even if they do, how is 56 ever a good call. Is he hoping i raise 34. Ha! Anyway this piece of shit made it to the final table.
Any way i go card dead and see 84 off suit and just drip blinds and antes. We got to the final table and i have 10bb's and shove AJ in early. I know i am fucked when i am insta called in the seat to my left. He has AK. What cracks me up though (not at all actually) is the fact that Mr Call 56, calls after the shove and the insta call. He calls all in again with QT suited. AND MAKES 2 PAIR TO TAKE THE MAIN POT.
Fuck off
What a difference a day makes
Well, as per normal i forgot my plan for world domination on the Party Poker tables and didn't start my "all day session" till very late afternoon. Idiot. When i did start i very soon wished i never bothered as i played like a donkey and ran even worse. i am not going to blame anyone or anything other than myself but i lost almost everything back to the tables. I have about 20 dollars left on there but seriously lost 5 mini buy ins in record time. AQ suited vs AK all in on a 2 heart flop with 2 overs and the nut flush draw called by A high and not improving etc etc. To be honest the way i was playing today was just not as considered as yesterday. Yesterday i was fearless as i only had 10 dollars but raised and shoved when i thought i had the best of it and rolled it up nicely in about an hour. Today i just shoved erraticly into bigger stacks who didn't fold or simply ran into better hands. I guess that was to do with running and playing well yesterday and just EXPECTING to do the same again today.
I am honestly pissed off with myself. For some reason i couldn't withdraw any when i went there this morning and now have nothing to show for it. I wasn't gonna withdraw it all, just a bit along with half yesterdays winnings from PokerStars. Together it would have made about fifty squids. I didn't want to withdraw it all as i had this vision of playing well and making up a decent roll again. I just hope now that i can contue to run well on Stars and hopefully we will have the whole operation up and running again by breakfast tomorrow.
GAYYYYYY BAR!!
oh yeah - with regards to yesterdays posting about Poker X Factor and their dumb password retrieval system; last night i filled out a form on their site and sent it off and i had a response back today. Fantastic. The funny part is the response was not automated and was sent by a guy called Paul. It was Paul's job to remind me of my ridiculous password. I have strange passwords everywhere (20 poker accounts, 2 email addresses, 6 casting sites, 4 bank accounts etc) but this one is very silly and very embarassing. How could i forget that one?! Lool - cheers Paul- don't tell anyone!
Just spell checked - the first post ever not littered with yellow mistakes woo.
I am honestly pissed off with myself. For some reason i couldn't withdraw any when i went there this morning and now have nothing to show for it. I wasn't gonna withdraw it all, just a bit along with half yesterdays winnings from PokerStars. Together it would have made about fifty squids. I didn't want to withdraw it all as i had this vision of playing well and making up a decent roll again. I just hope now that i can contue to run well on Stars and hopefully we will have the whole operation up and running again by breakfast tomorrow.
GAYYYYYY BAR!!
oh yeah - with regards to yesterdays posting about Poker X Factor and their dumb password retrieval system; last night i filled out a form on their site and sent it off and i had a response back today. Fantastic. The funny part is the response was not automated and was sent by a guy called Paul. It was Paul's job to remind me of my ridiculous password. I have strange passwords everywhere (20 poker accounts, 2 email addresses, 6 casting sites, 4 bank accounts etc) but this one is very silly and very embarassing. How could i forget that one?! Lool - cheers Paul- don't tell anyone!
Just spell checked - the first post ever not littered with yellow mistakes woo.
Wednesday, October 10, 2007
Party Joker(s)
Hey up
Today i opened me email (no postal strike there) to find 10 dollars from the people at party poker. Last time i was there was about a year ago where i rolled up 25 dolls into a thousand before losing a few hundred, getting scared and fleeing with the money. Today i have been at the site for about an hour and sitting with $10 at the 10-25c - 6 max tables, turned it into $75. Holy shit it was easy! I did hit some cards and catch some flops but i was folding a lot and people just didn't seem to fold when i was deciding to play. Great for me, bad for them.
Now i don't know what to do. Its 30 quid for free. Not really enough to withdraw, but times are very hard these days. A job?? yes i should get a job. Very clever. But lets not talk about that for a moment. I think i should just try and roll this up as best i can and make smaller withdrawals as and when i can. If i run like i just did (which is impossible) i will be rich be Monday. Woo
I realised something today. That is that i really don't play session poker. I tend to sit down for an hour or 3 and play. I have never (unlike Brian Townsend) sat down for 14-16 hours and played all day. I wonder what would happen. Rags or riches? i wonder....hmmm. Free tomorrow?? Of course. Play all day? Maybe i will.
After my brothers recommendation i have just bought a Tiger Woods golf game for my PS2. Its ace and may well keep me off the pokes when i should be trying to earn some money. I got a really old version from Game or somewhere for £4. Apparently the new one is just out but i thought I'd spend this little bit of money to see if i liked it first.
Today i actually had the intention of watching a load of poker x factor videos but i can't remember my password. At about 11am i requested the reminder thingy and sat with my email open doing other things. Nothing. I requested it again and again. Nothing. It is now 5.30pm. Personally i think that is very bad. I am a dissatisfied customer.
Good luck at the tables. Lets hope there are 12 tonnes of fishies logged in tomorrow. We are going to war. (Not really war - obviously - just watching 300 on DVD and getting a bit feisty)
Oh yeah. As you may remember (probably not) i went for a part a while ago for a pilot episode for a TV show. I got the part and met my band members. We have recorded our first single and the video and from the 18th of this month we are shooting the pilot. Read the script the other day. Very funny. Keeping the old fingers crossed that it turns out well.
Good luck my little lamb chops
Today i opened me email (no postal strike there) to find 10 dollars from the people at party poker. Last time i was there was about a year ago where i rolled up 25 dolls into a thousand before losing a few hundred, getting scared and fleeing with the money. Today i have been at the site for about an hour and sitting with $10 at the 10-25c - 6 max tables, turned it into $75. Holy shit it was easy! I did hit some cards and catch some flops but i was folding a lot and people just didn't seem to fold when i was deciding to play. Great for me, bad for them.
Now i don't know what to do. Its 30 quid for free. Not really enough to withdraw, but times are very hard these days. A job?? yes i should get a job. Very clever. But lets not talk about that for a moment. I think i should just try and roll this up as best i can and make smaller withdrawals as and when i can. If i run like i just did (which is impossible) i will be rich be Monday. Woo
I realised something today. That is that i really don't play session poker. I tend to sit down for an hour or 3 and play. I have never (unlike Brian Townsend) sat down for 14-16 hours and played all day. I wonder what would happen. Rags or riches? i wonder....hmmm. Free tomorrow?? Of course. Play all day? Maybe i will.
After my brothers recommendation i have just bought a Tiger Woods golf game for my PS2. Its ace and may well keep me off the pokes when i should be trying to earn some money. I got a really old version from Game or somewhere for £4. Apparently the new one is just out but i thought I'd spend this little bit of money to see if i liked it first.
Today i actually had the intention of watching a load of poker x factor videos but i can't remember my password. At about 11am i requested the reminder thingy and sat with my email open doing other things. Nothing. I requested it again and again. Nothing. It is now 5.30pm. Personally i think that is very bad. I am a dissatisfied customer.
Good luck at the tables. Lets hope there are 12 tonnes of fishies logged in tomorrow. We are going to war. (Not really war - obviously - just watching 300 on DVD and getting a bit feisty)
Oh yeah. As you may remember (probably not) i went for a part a while ago for a pilot episode for a TV show. I got the part and met my band members. We have recorded our first single and the video and from the 18th of this month we are shooting the pilot. Read the script the other day. Very funny. Keeping the old fingers crossed that it turns out well.
Good luck my little lamb chops
Saturday, October 06, 2007
why am i still up??
I am in a huge field tournament. The buy in?? Good question. 50 cents. Yup, Half a dollar or approximately 25p! Lol high stakes. I shall try to explain...
I guess i am still up because I just love the night time at the moment and am obsessed with poker. I am also just starting Season 2 of Alias. Its actually quite a formulaic show but i love it, plus Jennifer Garner is so hot it's crazy. I watched about half of Daredevil or Elektra or whatever and was like "meh", and now, i love her.
After losing that money yesterday ( like a moron) i logged into my bank and assessed the state of my funds. Bad. I decided that after recent cash outs i would allow myself $50 back to get me in the game. Not the BIG game obviously, that's not enough money, tut! In the end i just bought in enough for 3 - 4.40's after Rizen said that is what he would use to build a roll if he went broke. Also because i know i can do OK in these games.
Game 1 - to say i had 3 attempts to make money i fucked this up good and proper. I played wayhey too loose. Really pissed someone off when i dropped to 1k in chips and called the rest all in on a 3 - 1 shot with J4 suited. I flopped the J and the 4 flush and hit on the river to beat his kings. I then reraised all in with 33 and ws called by JJ. I'm an idiot
Game 2 - Finished 18th just in the money. I called raise in the bb from a mid position raiser. I had 33. The flop was 757 which i shoved. He called with kings. If i win that i am a contender as it was i was a marginal stack and now have 2 buyins again.
Game 3 - i lost a pot with KK very early i had reraised strong pre flop and got called the flop came ATx and i was chk raised. I folded. As you know, when you only have 1500 chips it is not that forgiving of an early mistake/outdraw. I shoved JK suited and got called by a player for all his chips. He had A4 off suit. He won.
Game 4 - 4th. Decent. Made my 3rd laydown of kk on the flop in 3 tournaments. Pretty infuriating. You see kings 4 handed and just go "kerching" today i just kept having to fold them on A high flops. After that i went 4th place and basicall decided it was all in or out time. I started shoving decent hands and shoved an ace from the button and was called by a bigger one. I hit my kicker and paired on the flop and the turn gave him his queen. I have noticed this a lot on PokerStars, i say its the home of the suckout resuckout. They apparently would rather go with the catchphrase "where the stars play poker". Agree to disagree.
I was then reading Tillerman's blog and he referenced the Jesus challenge. I looked at the tracking of Chris Ferguson's money and was inspired to start my own challenge. Hence the low limit tourney. I headed off to the micro limit cash games and lasted about 3 buyins before calling it a day. Reraised pre flop with KK - called - flop 984 - called - turn 5 - i shove all in - called by T8 - river 8 - nice. It went on. I was just going "lol nh" for about 30 minutes before i had to go. And i was just doing really well in this tourney until i started writing this and now i busted there too. Open ended straight draw me into top pair Q with a ten kicker. I thought he might fold. HAAAAAAA!!! Thought he might fold. What was i thinking!!!
To be honest, i believe you would have to have the patience of a saint (or Jesus) to complete this challenge and I'm already at $30 (what i am allowing myself to start with), he said the hardest part was getting to $6. Clearly I'm fucked.
I guess i am still up because I just love the night time at the moment and am obsessed with poker. I am also just starting Season 2 of Alias. Its actually quite a formulaic show but i love it, plus Jennifer Garner is so hot it's crazy. I watched about half of Daredevil or Elektra or whatever and was like "meh", and now, i love her.
After losing that money yesterday ( like a moron) i logged into my bank and assessed the state of my funds. Bad. I decided that after recent cash outs i would allow myself $50 back to get me in the game. Not the BIG game obviously, that's not enough money, tut! In the end i just bought in enough for 3 - 4.40's after Rizen said that is what he would use to build a roll if he went broke. Also because i know i can do OK in these games.
Game 1 - to say i had 3 attempts to make money i fucked this up good and proper. I played wayhey too loose. Really pissed someone off when i dropped to 1k in chips and called the rest all in on a 3 - 1 shot with J4 suited. I flopped the J and the 4 flush and hit on the river to beat his kings. I then reraised all in with 33 and ws called by JJ. I'm an idiot
Game 2 - Finished 18th just in the money. I called raise in the bb from a mid position raiser. I had 33. The flop was 757 which i shoved. He called with kings. If i win that i am a contender as it was i was a marginal stack and now have 2 buyins again.
Game 3 - i lost a pot with KK very early i had reraised strong pre flop and got called the flop came ATx and i was chk raised. I folded. As you know, when you only have 1500 chips it is not that forgiving of an early mistake/outdraw. I shoved JK suited and got called by a player for all his chips. He had A4 off suit. He won.
Game 4 - 4th. Decent. Made my 3rd laydown of kk on the flop in 3 tournaments. Pretty infuriating. You see kings 4 handed and just go "kerching" today i just kept having to fold them on A high flops. After that i went 4th place and basicall decided it was all in or out time. I started shoving decent hands and shoved an ace from the button and was called by a bigger one. I hit my kicker and paired on the flop and the turn gave him his queen. I have noticed this a lot on PokerStars, i say its the home of the suckout resuckout. They apparently would rather go with the catchphrase "where the stars play poker". Agree to disagree.
I was then reading Tillerman's blog and he referenced the Jesus challenge. I looked at the tracking of Chris Ferguson's money and was inspired to start my own challenge. Hence the low limit tourney. I headed off to the micro limit cash games and lasted about 3 buyins before calling it a day. Reraised pre flop with KK - called - flop 984 - called - turn 5 - i shove all in - called by T8 - river 8 - nice. It went on. I was just going "lol nh" for about 30 minutes before i had to go. And i was just doing really well in this tourney until i started writing this and now i busted there too. Open ended straight draw me into top pair Q with a ten kicker. I thought he might fold. HAAAAAAA!!! Thought he might fold. What was i thinking!!!
To be honest, i believe you would have to have the patience of a saint (or Jesus) to complete this challenge and I'm already at $30 (what i am allowing myself to start with), he said the hardest part was getting to $6. Clearly I'm fucked.
Friday, October 05, 2007
Oh yeah
Don't look at the link below if you do not have a few hours to waste. And I do mean waste.
www.addictinggames.com
I'm Sorry
www.addictinggames.com
I'm Sorry
One of those days
Hey up peeps
My God! yesterday was tough.
I was bashed about from pillar to post. Winning money, losing money. It was savage. I don't mind sharing with you that i came out in the red. I basically blew what i had left in my account. This is possible, by the way, as i continually withdraw from my poker account to pay for things some people would consider more important, hmmm, you know, like rent. £50 here and there, you know. Anyway i decided to put $25 on a cash table and within the space of an hour or so i had tripled that just through playing whilst lying down watching telly, ahhhhhh! I was just playing the cards and avoiding a huge pot unless i was sure i had the best of it. Happy days you might say. Well, it was not to last my poker friends. The money remained till yesterday. I sat with the first 25 and lost a couple of small pots and topped up to 25 again (as you should). Then in between winning some and losing some, i lost with KK to AA all in pre flop. 1 buy in. AK to KK all in on a K rag flop. JJ vs KQ spades on a 462- 2 spade flop - turn T spades and i am dead. AQ to AT etc. It just was endless. I was cool though. I was severely pissed off having lost, but not tilted like i might have been. I get tilted more when i see someone flip up J5 off suit. These were just tough breaks. I may have saved some money along the way, but i am not good enough, basically. Lol.
There was one hand in particular which i just remembered. There was a raise in mid position, i the cutoff called, i called on the button with Q9 clubs, the small blind called and the flop came KTJ. I have flopped the 2nd nuts. Beauty, and better since the nuts would be AQ and i have a Q so the chance of someone holding AQ is reduced. I wonder if you can guess where this is going?? So the sb bets the flop, the cutoff calls and i shumbolita all over the place (ahem, i mean i reraised all in, sorry about that, i don't know what happened) the sb insta calls with AQ. Nice job me. So bad.
The thing is that i know another day i would get called in the exact same situations, my 2nd nut shove would get called by AK for example and the AA vs KK all in pre, i could easily be up against AK. I was listening to bel0wab0ve on one of his PXF videos saying unless he has an extremely good reason to think the guy has aces he no longer folds KK pre flop. I tell you this, my fine brethren, if he isn't folding how the fook am i supposed to.
I also recently read, if you are in a pot and flop a set, get some heat from another player and fear they may have flopped a higher set, you are in the wrong game. Ie poker ain't for you. So that's it folks. Don't fold kings. I know most of you don't, even by the river, lol and push your sets hard.
Final thought - In a separate "bel0w" related moment. In a tourney he flopped a set of 666 on a flop with several draws on it. He very calmly said "obviously I'd go broke on this flop" ie he was gonna push it and if he got out drawn, so be it. In the same tone he flopped a K, with AK on a KQx flop and checked it to the caller, saying he won't go broke with just top pair on this flop.
Good luck homies
My God! yesterday was tough.
I was bashed about from pillar to post. Winning money, losing money. It was savage. I don't mind sharing with you that i came out in the red. I basically blew what i had left in my account. This is possible, by the way, as i continually withdraw from my poker account to pay for things some people would consider more important, hmmm, you know, like rent. £50 here and there, you know. Anyway i decided to put $25 on a cash table and within the space of an hour or so i had tripled that just through playing whilst lying down watching telly, ahhhhhh! I was just playing the cards and avoiding a huge pot unless i was sure i had the best of it. Happy days you might say. Well, it was not to last my poker friends. The money remained till yesterday. I sat with the first 25 and lost a couple of small pots and topped up to 25 again (as you should). Then in between winning some and losing some, i lost with KK to AA all in pre flop. 1 buy in. AK to KK all in on a K rag flop. JJ vs KQ spades on a 462- 2 spade flop - turn T spades and i am dead. AQ to AT etc. It just was endless. I was cool though. I was severely pissed off having lost, but not tilted like i might have been. I get tilted more when i see someone flip up J5 off suit. These were just tough breaks. I may have saved some money along the way, but i am not good enough, basically. Lol.
There was one hand in particular which i just remembered. There was a raise in mid position, i the cutoff called, i called on the button with Q9 clubs, the small blind called and the flop came KTJ. I have flopped the 2nd nuts. Beauty, and better since the nuts would be AQ and i have a Q so the chance of someone holding AQ is reduced. I wonder if you can guess where this is going?? So the sb bets the flop, the cutoff calls and i shumbolita all over the place (ahem, i mean i reraised all in, sorry about that, i don't know what happened) the sb insta calls with AQ. Nice job me. So bad.
The thing is that i know another day i would get called in the exact same situations, my 2nd nut shove would get called by AK for example and the AA vs KK all in pre, i could easily be up against AK. I was listening to bel0wab0ve on one of his PXF videos saying unless he has an extremely good reason to think the guy has aces he no longer folds KK pre flop. I tell you this, my fine brethren, if he isn't folding how the fook am i supposed to.
I also recently read, if you are in a pot and flop a set, get some heat from another player and fear they may have flopped a higher set, you are in the wrong game. Ie poker ain't for you. So that's it folks. Don't fold kings. I know most of you don't, even by the river, lol and push your sets hard.
Final thought - In a separate "bel0w" related moment. In a tourney he flopped a set of 666 on a flop with several draws on it. He very calmly said "obviously I'd go broke on this flop" ie he was gonna push it and if he got out drawn, so be it. In the same tone he flopped a K, with AK on a KQx flop and checked it to the caller, saying he won't go broke with just top pair on this flop.
Good luck homies
Wednesday, October 03, 2007
Got me thinking
Hello sports fans
Last night i was once again up until ridiculous (sp?) o'clock taking on the huge field of the PokerStars, midnight, $10, whatever guaranteed. I finished 350th ish of 2500 or so. I don't know, who cares?! No money, blah. I busted after a player limped in late position, the small blind minimum raises and it is to me in the bb. Now i have AQspades. I decide he is weak or else he would raise more than min. I decide he has cards decent cards that he wants to see a flop with. His bet is 800, i make it 2000 as i want the other guy out and want him to call more money with a worse hand. The late player folds and he calls. All good so far. The flop comes 9TJ. I have 2 overs and an open ended straight draw a back door flush draw and more chips. He bets 1000 ish and i shove. He insta calls me, all his chips with AT clubs. He holds with second pair and i am down to the felt. I split a pot with A3 when i shove the next hand, i call a raise all in with AK and double up. Some dumb bitch gives me 5 minutes till i am out. I tell her i don't give a fuck and she should shut he pie hole. She tells me i am sad, as sad as those programmes about starving Africans. I tell her that that is impossible as i am as fat as fuck (not true ladies!) and that if i sat on her she would be dead. She then said i was chat blocked as she was "to" intelligent for me. That just cracked me up and the silly bitch had untilted me through the power of my winning the banter war. I then shoved k3 - she insta reshoved with 44 - the board paired and counterfeited her- fantastic -then i shoved 33 and was called from the blinds by 99. Ball sack!
Anyway, the reason for this post is to do with an old post i wrote and an article i just read. The article is in this months Poker Player magazine (link right) about bankroll management. This is a good article and will be on their website shortly if it isn't there already. It was basically discussing good bankroll strategy, the stuff we all know, 5% of roll for cash tables and 2% of roll for stt or mtt's, etc. But here is what i thought was interesting. It said you don't need BR management if you are playing for fun, letting off steam etc. If you have serious poker ambition then it is vital to succeed. (although there are others whose recklessness, or educated gambles has got them to their position now). Another interesting point is that bankroll management is only going to work IF you are a winning player. The percentages risked each game are offset by the long term profits you will make IF YOU ARE A WINNING PLAYER. If you are not a winning player then no matter how good your BRM is you will still lose. So my point here links back to a previous post on variance. The post said something along the lines of;
we all experience variance, when your T7 loses to KQ on a KT7 flop etc, today it lost but more often than not it will win. So often i am on different blogs, forums, sites etc where variance is the reason for the losses. It is undoubtedly true that the complainers do suffer from varience, but thay also suffer from making bad plays over and over again yet this "pro term", a term to describe a winning players run of bad luck is often to blame from any player no matter what their current limit is.
This links to the BRM thing. It is all well and good harping on about percentages and number of buyins but if you are not a good player you may as well just forget it and rebuy until you can no longer afford to play. The magazine literally says if you are a losing player you may as well ignore it and risk everything as tday may be your lucky day.
One thing i have always been about this game is honest (except when in a hand, obv). It is important to me to be honest with myself about monies won or lost, plays made, good and bad, as well as how my overall game is, otherwise how else can i improve. One thing i am not going to do is say i can beat a game when i can't. My ROI over 600+ tournaments is currently something like 19/20%. This is not great but it is improving. If my results are bad and i am losing money, i may as well just play at the play money tables and take the occasional shot at a tournament and practice no BRM. Whats the point if i am a long term loser anyway? Lol - a long term loser.
My final thought is - it is great to read abut poker and improve your game, to implement strategy and to progress through the levels. But don't forget that the experience of playing and REALLY paying attention is important for learning too. "Poker strategy - no matter how good - is no substitute for years of experience". A lot of low limit players, myself included, just haven't logged the serious hours, equating to years of game time. I have played for nearly 2 years. (It was meant to be going better than it is by this stage - lol). BUT, the first month i was logging on and buying i didn't even know what beats what. $50 gone? Rebuy! Also don't forget that a lot of the strategies are designed to be long term winning plays and don't account for the random plays of the NL$25 tables. Harrington is great, but how well is a hand analysis from the final table at the WSOP going to help against a player who can't fold second pair in a $5 stt. BRM is crucial to getting further if you are seriously considering this as a profession, but if you're not, you just play for a hobby, or if you are a long term loser, then who gives a shit, as long as you can afford it.
Enjoy yourselves you lovely people
Dan
Last night i was once again up until ridiculous (sp?) o'clock taking on the huge field of the PokerStars, midnight, $10, whatever guaranteed. I finished 350th ish of 2500 or so. I don't know, who cares?! No money, blah. I busted after a player limped in late position, the small blind minimum raises and it is to me in the bb. Now i have AQspades. I decide he is weak or else he would raise more than min. I decide he has cards decent cards that he wants to see a flop with. His bet is 800, i make it 2000 as i want the other guy out and want him to call more money with a worse hand. The late player folds and he calls. All good so far. The flop comes 9TJ. I have 2 overs and an open ended straight draw a back door flush draw and more chips. He bets 1000 ish and i shove. He insta calls me, all his chips with AT clubs. He holds with second pair and i am down to the felt. I split a pot with A3 when i shove the next hand, i call a raise all in with AK and double up. Some dumb bitch gives me 5 minutes till i am out. I tell her i don't give a fuck and she should shut he pie hole. She tells me i am sad, as sad as those programmes about starving Africans. I tell her that that is impossible as i am as fat as fuck (not true ladies!) and that if i sat on her she would be dead. She then said i was chat blocked as she was "to" intelligent for me. That just cracked me up and the silly bitch had untilted me through the power of my winning the banter war. I then shoved k3 - she insta reshoved with 44 - the board paired and counterfeited her- fantastic -then i shoved 33 and was called from the blinds by 99. Ball sack!
Anyway, the reason for this post is to do with an old post i wrote and an article i just read. The article is in this months Poker Player magazine (link right) about bankroll management. This is a good article and will be on their website shortly if it isn't there already. It was basically discussing good bankroll strategy, the stuff we all know, 5% of roll for cash tables and 2% of roll for stt or mtt's, etc. But here is what i thought was interesting. It said you don't need BR management if you are playing for fun, letting off steam etc. If you have serious poker ambition then it is vital to succeed. (although there are others whose recklessness, or educated gambles has got them to their position now). Another interesting point is that bankroll management is only going to work IF you are a winning player. The percentages risked each game are offset by the long term profits you will make IF YOU ARE A WINNING PLAYER. If you are not a winning player then no matter how good your BRM is you will still lose. So my point here links back to a previous post on variance. The post said something along the lines of;
we all experience variance, when your T7 loses to KQ on a KT7 flop etc, today it lost but more often than not it will win. So often i am on different blogs, forums, sites etc where variance is the reason for the losses. It is undoubtedly true that the complainers do suffer from varience, but thay also suffer from making bad plays over and over again yet this "pro term", a term to describe a winning players run of bad luck is often to blame from any player no matter what their current limit is.
This links to the BRM thing. It is all well and good harping on about percentages and number of buyins but if you are not a good player you may as well just forget it and rebuy until you can no longer afford to play. The magazine literally says if you are a losing player you may as well ignore it and risk everything as tday may be your lucky day.
One thing i have always been about this game is honest (except when in a hand, obv). It is important to me to be honest with myself about monies won or lost, plays made, good and bad, as well as how my overall game is, otherwise how else can i improve. One thing i am not going to do is say i can beat a game when i can't. My ROI over 600+ tournaments is currently something like 19/20%. This is not great but it is improving. If my results are bad and i am losing money, i may as well just play at the play money tables and take the occasional shot at a tournament and practice no BRM. Whats the point if i am a long term loser anyway? Lol - a long term loser.
My final thought is - it is great to read abut poker and improve your game, to implement strategy and to progress through the levels. But don't forget that the experience of playing and REALLY paying attention is important for learning too. "Poker strategy - no matter how good - is no substitute for years of experience". A lot of low limit players, myself included, just haven't logged the serious hours, equating to years of game time. I have played for nearly 2 years. (It was meant to be going better than it is by this stage - lol). BUT, the first month i was logging on and buying i didn't even know what beats what. $50 gone? Rebuy! Also don't forget that a lot of the strategies are designed to be long term winning plays and don't account for the random plays of the NL$25 tables. Harrington is great, but how well is a hand analysis from the final table at the WSOP going to help against a player who can't fold second pair in a $5 stt. BRM is crucial to getting further if you are seriously considering this as a profession, but if you're not, you just play for a hobby, or if you are a long term loser, then who gives a shit, as long as you can afford it.
Enjoy yourselves you lovely people
Dan
Tuesday, October 02, 2007
Yawn, another cash
PokerStars 6pm (GMT) 5k guaranteed $5 buy in. Just finished 161st of 2099 players for a meagre $13, ha!
Closing hand, ep raises called, i call, with QT spades. Flop Q67 - 2 spades. I check raise all in on the flop and get called by 67 of diamonds. That was all she wrote when no improvements were to be found.
Also had a terrible day today with my other games. Felt really positive and just shafted. Shoved a K high flop with AA called by KQos, all in. Turn Q. All in with KK on an 8 high flop, turn 8. They are 2 that busted me from tournaments and that particularly memorable. But trust me, it was a cruel day.
Hope you are having better luck than me at the tables.
Closing hand, ep raises called, i call, with QT spades. Flop Q67 - 2 spades. I check raise all in on the flop and get called by 67 of diamonds. That was all she wrote when no improvements were to be found.
Also had a terrible day today with my other games. Felt really positive and just shafted. Shoved a K high flop with AA called by KQos, all in. Turn Q. All in with KK on an 8 high flop, turn 8. They are 2 that busted me from tournaments and that particularly memorable. But trust me, it was a cruel day.
Hope you are having better luck than me at the tables.
TheV0id
Congratulations to "TheV0id" for winning the main event - event 23 at the WCOOP on PokerStars. I just visited official poker rankings and checked his stats. He has played one tournament. That one. So the buy in was 2.5k and he won 1.2 million. ROI through the roof!! LoL. I also read he is from the UK so good work especially given the all nighter you pulled.
I watched some of this tournament as it was interesting to watch the pros play the little hands. I watched some of Humberto and Raymer but mostly watched KidPoker. He busted after seeing a Kxx flop. The pot was raised pre he had called the button had called. The flop was bet the button reraised 25k, all of negreanu's chips. Daniel said "so you're saying i'm beat lol", his timer was running down and he said "KQ yeah?", he then thought for ages before saying "i'm gonna pay you like a donkey" and called with KJ. His opponent did indeed have KQ and Negreanu was reduced to the rail but not before someone said "what are you doing?" and he said he was tired. Must be tough sat at your computer folding cards.
Also interesting was looking at the stats for "ka$ino" who finished 2nd in this event for $700k. His stats were over 500 tournament games on Stars. Back in 05/06 he was playing $1 (Yes one dollar) tournaments. He was playing others to but plenty of these. A few cashes in 06 seemed to send him onto bigger things but he is not a big player at all. His biggest cash was about 4k. Can you imagine being overjoyed to cash 4k, how you must feel to bank 700k IN ONE NIGHT!
I really recommend OPR (official poker rankings) for checking others stats as well as your own. Your stats come up for the last 120 days only, but you can do all time or even month by month.
I went deep in the $11 25k guaranteed AGAIN the other night. I got into the money after 3000 people had entered. We had a break and i was below average chips but still about 25 big blinds. The money from 350 to 50 is fairly inconsequential, the range of payouts being $11 to $150 or so so i made a move and found myself in a race i couldn't win. I had 77 on the button and reraised all in. I was called by AK and was in great shape until the rivered K. Finished 339th. Hey ho. I am definitely much more used to the way these play now and tournaments in general. I still hate the idiots and the beats but love the game. When i first had a go at these i was scared to play. It wasn't cos of the buy in obviously, i think it was the prospect of winning. I would play uber tight and watch the payouts approach really desperate to make it in and to move up. Now all i care about is wining first place cos i really want $5k, ha! I still need to get more used to just watching my position in the tournament and blind levels rather than other stacks on my table in relation to my own. However every little corner turned or aspect realised is gonna be good in the long run.
I was thinking the other day about last years poker and it was ALL cash games. Getting used to tournaments has been long and emotional but is definitely getting somewhere and i am sure that before much longer i will have a bankroll that can support successful ventures at both.
Just bought Tiger Woods Golf on my PS2 and am off to play some high stakes golf against an animated opponent. Ahhhh the life of the unemployed.
Enjoy it you little monkeys
I watched some of this tournament as it was interesting to watch the pros play the little hands. I watched some of Humberto and Raymer but mostly watched KidPoker. He busted after seeing a Kxx flop. The pot was raised pre he had called the button had called. The flop was bet the button reraised 25k, all of negreanu's chips. Daniel said "so you're saying i'm beat lol", his timer was running down and he said "KQ yeah?", he then thought for ages before saying "i'm gonna pay you like a donkey" and called with KJ. His opponent did indeed have KQ and Negreanu was reduced to the rail but not before someone said "what are you doing?" and he said he was tired. Must be tough sat at your computer folding cards.
Also interesting was looking at the stats for "ka$ino" who finished 2nd in this event for $700k. His stats were over 500 tournament games on Stars. Back in 05/06 he was playing $1 (Yes one dollar) tournaments. He was playing others to but plenty of these. A few cashes in 06 seemed to send him onto bigger things but he is not a big player at all. His biggest cash was about 4k. Can you imagine being overjoyed to cash 4k, how you must feel to bank 700k IN ONE NIGHT!
I really recommend OPR (official poker rankings) for checking others stats as well as your own. Your stats come up for the last 120 days only, but you can do all time or even month by month.
I went deep in the $11 25k guaranteed AGAIN the other night. I got into the money after 3000 people had entered. We had a break and i was below average chips but still about 25 big blinds. The money from 350 to 50 is fairly inconsequential, the range of payouts being $11 to $150 or so so i made a move and found myself in a race i couldn't win. I had 77 on the button and reraised all in. I was called by AK and was in great shape until the rivered K. Finished 339th. Hey ho. I am definitely much more used to the way these play now and tournaments in general. I still hate the idiots and the beats but love the game. When i first had a go at these i was scared to play. It wasn't cos of the buy in obviously, i think it was the prospect of winning. I would play uber tight and watch the payouts approach really desperate to make it in and to move up. Now all i care about is wining first place cos i really want $5k, ha! I still need to get more used to just watching my position in the tournament and blind levels rather than other stacks on my table in relation to my own. However every little corner turned or aspect realised is gonna be good in the long run.
I was thinking the other day about last years poker and it was ALL cash games. Getting used to tournaments has been long and emotional but is definitely getting somewhere and i am sure that before much longer i will have a bankroll that can support successful ventures at both.
Just bought Tiger Woods Golf on my PS2 and am off to play some high stakes golf against an animated opponent. Ahhhh the life of the unemployed.
Enjoy it you little monkeys
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