Tuesday, July 31, 2007

Movies and me

Whats up dudes?

Just a quick one to say -

1) Don't watch Ghost Rider, the Marvel comic adaptation starring Nic Cage and Eva Mendes. I am a comic movie fan. All the Batman's, Blade, Spidey etc. This, unfortunately is absolute gash.

2) Instead, why not rent the best films i have seen recently.
- The Science of Sleep - starring the excellent Gael Garcia Bernal and Charlotte Ginsbourg, directed by the fantastic Michel Gondry, director of Eternal Sunshine. Such a weird, quirky and uniquely beautiful film.
- The Fountain - starring Hugh Jackman, Rachel Weizs and Ellen Burstyn who are all excellent. Seriously, if you only know Jackman as Wolverine, check this shit. It is by the writer director Darren Aronofsky who also made Requiem For a Dream, also a must see. This film is unusual. I sat through the first half n hour thinking i was hating it and it resulted in me absolutely loving it. Beautiful, emotional and original. Do it. Do it now.
- A Guide to Recognizing Your Saints - with Robert Downey Jr and written and Directed by Dito Montiel. This guy Montiel wrote book about his life growing up and this is the film based on that story. It is really very good.

3) That part i went for yesterday. I only went and got it! Can't believe it, i am really chuffed to bits. Had a chat with the writer/director just now and i am really excited. Basically it is a pilot for a sit com for the telly. In case you don't know, what people do is, when they have an idea, they assess levels of interest and test the water. If that is positive they make a pilot of one episode o how the show will look. This is then touted around all the channels to see if someone wants to buy it. So that's the next stage. Get together, talk it through, see the script, learn that, then film it baybee.

In the vain of some other blogs out there - its like flopping quads.

Love ya

tournaments and tears

Whats up brothers and sisters?

I have just played the sickest 180 ever. I didn't feel like playing much today but by the time tonight came round, i knew I'd be good.

Basically i got smacked full in the face by the deck. An example of the sickness is illustrated below.

I limp in late with 33 after 2 limpers. The flop is A43 with 2 clubs. It checks to me and i bet. One player stays in and calls. The turn is a 5. He shoves all in. I have a tonne of chips by the way but its still a big pot. due to the fact that he has limped in first i figure he has an ace something. maybe has 2 pr. Obviously i consider the 2 for the straight but he has been all in a few recent hands and i doubt he limps in first with a deuce and another card. 22 is the only conceivable option as far as i am concerned. So i call. He has K2 off suit (lol) for the straight and i am a mile behind.

River 3 - implausible quads! Love it.

I reach the final table first in chips with 100k - the closest competitor has 25k. Nice. Obviously there are a few double ups so i am not a monster for long. I witness the most horrific stream of beats and suddenly players who should be out are big contenders.

Then my luck tuns out. I raise the button with AQ clubs - i flop a flush draw but the board is paired 442 with 2 clubs. My opp bets - i raise - he calls. I put him on a pair like 77/88. The turn is an A so i am sure i am well ahead now. He checks i bet he raises i call. He has A4 for a turned FH. I don't really know how i get away from that. Maybe if i was just a better player. lol

I am down to the final 4 but am now 3rd. I raise the button with A8 off suit - same opponent reraises. I fold.

Later same opponent raises - i have AT off - i should have called to see a flop but i shoved. He paused - god knows why and then called with QQ. I am gone. The luck ran out.

I'll be back tomorrow.

Also - played my first bloggerment this weekend. I came 17th of 30 odd. My final hand (after only having 22 and AQ spades in the first hour and determined not to play shit! Ha!) i have AJ clubs in the big blind. Suffolk over raises slightly in the cutoff. I figure out where i think stand and am right when i reraise and he doesn't fold 55. He then hits a 5 on the flop, so i'm fucked. Good work Sir.

In other news, i had an audition today for a part i really want and think i fucked it up. A lot of actors go to auditions and regardless of what happened say "i think i fucked it up". I am not one of these attention seeking types. I usually come out going "yeah it went really well" and then am astounded when i don't get it. PMA baby! Today was different. I was hugely upset. Felt like a failure and had an argument with my good lady. Rubbish.

Later made up and then finished 4th. Every cloud and all that.

I'll let you know tomorrow when they tell me i didn't get it

Night night

Friday, July 27, 2007

Back at the cash tables

Whats up ma brothers (and sisters?)

I busted in the 5 dollar, 6pm, 5k guaranteed after some guy couldn't pass AQ on a flop with a player al in. I knew i was ahead on the low flop with 55. He stayed on the flop, turn and rivered a flush that beat my 5 high flush. I was out when it folds to me on the button and i shove with JQ suited, he calls with K3 hearts. This is whilst he is telling me i have given him all my chips. Ok mate. I was actually really angry. Not tilted like normal i mean if i was there i would have smashed him in the face with my frying pan. (i always have one by me)

So what did i do when i was so vexed. Did i have a hot bath with essential chamomile oils? Did i go to the gym and run off the aggression? Did i perhaps go to the local beauty salon for a relaxing massage and facial?

No. I sat at the cash tables. Ha! what am i like? I can't help myself! lunacy

Well, i sat at two .25/.50 tables with $10 at each. By the time i had $30 on 1 i had zero on the other. I just didn't get any cards or hit any flops so it dripped away. In comparison on the other table i caught aces 4 times and just hit loads of flops against idiots. Eventually i left the table approximately an hour and 15 later with $112. Great stuff! So up $90 in an hour.

The last hand was fookin ace. I was much looser than a lot of the players on the table and was in a lot of raised pots. It was really paying off and i was taking down pots with a lots of semi bluffs. I called an early position raise with 55. The flop was a beautiful A95. The initial raiser bet, i raised, he called. The turn was another ace. He checked i bet strong he raised all in i called. He has AK the poor bloke. Raising AK correctly and flopping 3 aces. How the fk is he not going broke.

Oh well its all good. I have deposited a lot of small amounts lately so i can withdraw to cover that and hopefully keep going like this. The cash games should, fingers crossed, provide a profit and buyins for my tourney entries.

Get in ya bitch!


That was my impulse title for this post as i played a cash game last night. As soon as i wrote it i realised it is what i would have written if i had cashed in a tournament, which i haven't. Yet.

Last night i busted from the 6pm, $5, 5k guaranteed. This is a new regular fixture for me i decided. Not too crowded a field and still 3k in chips and 15 minute levels. Nice one. I don;t know how i went out but no doubt i was a huge favourite. Just kidding.

Later i busted in the midnight after 2 3/4 hours. I made a really dumb play. Basically i called a late position raise from an active player, i had QJ clubs (i fukin love clubs). The flop came K89 with 2 spades. Not a great flop although i do have a gutshot and there is only one over card. I check call a flop bet. Miss. Instead of stopping here i check call again. I hit a queen on the river so now have to call that. He has AK. I don't know why i do this. I need to just drill it into my head that i am calling a raise out of position to hit a flop hard. Not catch half of nothing and do a load of chips with it. Muppet.

Before this hand i had been moved to the right of a player with 24k in chips. He had his fat face as his avatar and was talking shit and playing any hand. I found kings and shoved early position he called with A7 off suit and i doubled. Later i shove QT suited and find myself in bad shape to his KQ and i'm gone.

I am wide awake so i jump to some cash tables. I decide to play a minimum buy in and see what happens. So i sit with $10 at 0.25/0.50. I lose it immediately with QJs vs KJs on a J high flop when i river 2 pr and he makes a straight. I lose another 10 fairly standard.

On the third $10, i call a raise on the button with 77. The pot is approx $5. The flop is an ugly KTx. He pauses and bets $1. This is a pathetic bet here - i call. The turn is a 7. Bingo. This does put 2 floosh draws out. He checks. Pussy. I bet $1, and laugh at my hilarious genius. He raises. I know he is weak so i shove. He calls with JJ.

I make may way to $30 and we are even in money. Until this happens.

I raise after it folds to me. I am in the cutoff with 96 diamonds. I am reraised quite strong from the bb. I call. The flop is Q94 - he bets - obviously - i call. Turn 6. I love it. I know i am ahead of his big pp. He bets strong i raise all in he calls. The river is a disaster. It's a 4. So he rivers a better 2 pair with his KK. Mother fucker. He then says thank you. Like he set me up. The fuckin plum. I was steamed and actually called him dumbo! God knows why. I am usually much more intelligently offensive in these situations. He was like, Doh what did you have. I didn't say that if you just thought for a minute there are only 2 hands that he couldn't beat til the river that were screwed by the river card. Them being Q9 and 96. Little bitch.

That did me in. Down to 2 dollars. I sorted that out to $10 and built that up to $40 and left the table eventually with $25.

I definitely had fun playing and if favourable situations had gone my way i would have finished on $70 with a $30 profit for a short session. Definitely beatable. I saw a lot of hands not folded when they should have been and hands like a flopped 2 pr getting paid off till the river by top pr. It was much fun and a while since i played this level. I am thinking about buying August off too and giving myself a small roll. This will be a roll to cover a small venture back into cash games as well as several tournaments a few times a week where my real aim is to make a significant tournament cash, to build on the roll by playing cash games and to be more disciplined as a player. It will probably be a more significant amount like 500 dollars. Eek!

Wednesday, July 25, 2007

I knew i wasn't in the right frame of mind

Good evening sports fans.

Just a quick one. I have just boosted from the midnight 20k guaranteed after about 30 minutes. Truly a pathetic attempt. hands of interest.

1) First hand - i have 22 and limp in third - there are several limpers - flop comes AJ2 - with 2 diamonds - i bet pot -called in 1 spot - the turn is an ace - non diamond - i bet pot - called river 3 - i bet smaller - am min raised and call it - he has 45 diamonds.

Ok so he paid a lot to draw and didn't really get a big river payoff

2) I flop top pr and bet each st - opp is check calling with 8 outs to a straight - hits the river but checks - i check too - expensive draw no payoff.

i now have 1800 from initial 3k and hate having lost so much so soon

3) There is a small raise and a couple of callers - i call in the blinds with A6clubs - the flop brings a KJx - with 2 clubs. I lead out for 200 and am reraised by the button. I can't call here imo so shove. see myself with 12 outs and hit the turn. He mocks me. I think he;s a prick. Fair play he has AK so i have 9 outs and am just shy of 60/40 underdog but i have just lost a bunch of chips and i fail to see what the point is of playing a hand like ace suited if you're not gonna be happy flopping a 4 flush. He was of the opinion that it was early to be all in on a draw. I am of the opinion that i would double up or bust and also of the opinion that he could keep his fuckin mouth shut.

4) Final hand. I limp the button w Q3 diamonds. There is a decent raise from the big blind. Our verbal friend calls and i call too. The flop is a lovely TQ3 but has 2 flush cards and the straight draw. Mr blind raiser bets strong. I have him on aces or kings. Matey peeps calls. He is behind me for sure - a pair perhaps. I shove right there. Raiser calls, so does our friend. How about this for some amusing irony. Our friend is all in on a flush draw. Is he drawing to the nuts? Is he fuck - he has T5 clubs for a monster T high straight draw. Our early position raiser has AA. Fantastic. The turn is a J diamonds. I go further ahead in the hand. The river is a 2 out ace for him to take it down with a set.


I am not playing like a maniac at the moment but i am seeing flops with a much more open range when in position.

As you may or may not know i am a blog fiend. Everyone i have spoken to in this community has had or will have their entire blog read by me sooner or later. So make them good, yeah? I am currently reading Rizens blog at www.rizenpoker.com Whats cool about this is that aside from being a skilled cash and mainly tournament player and decent guy he actually posts selected hands from his hand histories in the animated PokerXFactor format and explains them in text. I think its well worth a look for anyone wanting to see how a pro plays and thinks through different spots.

Good luck you dirty mothers

Saturday, July 21, 2007

Hey guys.

Just in case anyone is worried sick about me, i am okay. "Thank fuck" i bet you're all thinking. I have still been playing the odd 4.40, 180 and the nightly 20k guaranteed. Saturday I came 360th ish out of 2500 ish and last night came 607th out of 3610. Fuckin huge field, i would love to have more money and buy into higher tournies to face a smaller field. I feel pretty good to have got through this many people but pretty shit not to get over that last hurdle into the cash. Despite this and despite the suckouts, i am feeling pretty good about my game. Having just written that i have just boosted from tonights 20k. i got it all in early w AQ on a QJx flop only to be called by the pre flop reraiser who had KT off suit...?

I was down to 30 chips, the bb was 30 and it was me all in with K9 the nest hand. To cut a long story short, within the hour i had over 10k. Unfortunately the prolific button raiser couldn't fold Q9 "but it was suited" after a shoved all in from the small blind with AQ. Called me in a nano second incidentally. Fkin donks out in force. My last hand came when i raised pre in mid w 99 - i was reraised by the button who i was definitely calling due to past history, the bb went all in. At that point i knew i should fold but called anyway after i found the excuse somewhere in a dark corner of my mind. My excuse was, given that the bb had shoved on a few occasions already i could imagine the bb and the button on a similar range to each other, hopefully this might put me ahead with my pair, albeit in a race situation. I called before the rational part of my brain could kick in and i was gone 99 vs AT vs QQ.

Before i knew it i had bought into 2 more tourneys and have just boosted from 1 with 2 pr a flush draw and a straight draw - which lost to a straight.

God damn it.

Despite all this i will say i am feeling good about my game. Over the last few months i have been going deeper more consistently. I have made some changes which include a step back from a lot of thing i have read and seen and just playing tighter poker. I still call raises in position with speculative hands against big stacks but tend to raise with them less. This makes me feel like i don't have to retain control with a shit hand after the flop but i can, if the right flop comes, take the play from the initial raiser. I am also giving up more marginal flop hands easier. Top pair is still just one pair. I can honestly say that if i get a lot of heat at this stage at these limits, the player may be retarded but more often than not has a hand which beats mine. I am also still able to get all my chips in the pot at any stage of the hand if i think i am ahead. I know i still need to improve, especially tilt and playing when not fully fit to, but i can just feel a decent win is on its way. I fookin know it!

I spent today recording a voice over for an animated short film which is going to be submitted to international film festivals. I had a wicked time at this recording studio in Camden and met some wicked people and contacts for the future.

This blog is all over the place but i just thought something else. If you are feeling a little poker jaded, choose a low buy in tourney in your game of choice and basically just shove whenever you feel you have the best hand. I know that betting when we think we have the best hand is how we work, but to shove a raiser pre because you think your 99 is slightly ahead is what i'm talking about. If you are not sure pre flop call, see a flop. Has it helped? Yes? Blast all in. No check raises. No funny business. No jiggery pokery just hardcore US army style, Nuke Em Poker, "Texas Nuke Em" if you will. I'm off to nuke some cunts right now.

Thursday, July 19, 2007


After pondering what to do with myself poker wise, as well as losing $10 from Ultimate Bet (AK vs AT - strong raising pre - all in on an ATx flop - cunt) and £20 from Will Hill, i have redeposited the minimum on PokerStars, $10. My mission now, shoud i choose to accept it (erm, already have) is to play 1 and 2 dollar games and roll it up until i can play other games. I consider this a good move for 2 reasons. Firstly, it is punishment for treating my new BR with no respect. Now i must grind something together from the lowest of the low. Secondly, i have to respect the game. I am playing like such a twat. I am playing too fast, not thinking things through and not giving people nearly enough credit. Are they clever enough to make big bluffs? Not that often. Are they in fact more likely to have made a big hand by playing rags out of position in a raised pot? Much more likely. Think about it!

So i just played my first. $1 - 45 man tourney. Came first for $14. The best start possible. It was great. I honestly feel like i've won something huge! it's fucking pathetic! But, my A10 beat 66 when i had a bigger stack, that was the only "all in" pre flop i got myself in before i had tonnes of chips. The rest was easy. I busted the huge chip leader in 2 hands and by the time we were 4 handed i think i had 40-50k to their 8k. Funny.

So we'll see what happens now.

I honestly thought that after the 3 wins last week and withdrawing $300, leaving $200 in i had turned a corner in my poker career. I am so gutted i can't believe it. Granted, its not of Blue Scouse proportions, but i was winning sng's, from single table turbo's to multi man long hauls, i did not need to spunk a load playing impatient and high variance cash games.

The upshot to this is that once again i am on the rebuild. I am playing better than i have before but now i just need to get some patience and consistent rational play in mind and i'll really be getting somewhere.

In other news i have just checked my share prices. I got a gift of £1000 in shares about 6 years ago. The price we paid was around 50p per share. Shortly after buying them they rocketed up to £6 odd. If we had sold then we would have made £12k, gutted! Since that point they dropped to an all time low in 2003 of about 25p. Selling then would have made a loss of £500, hilarious. Due to recent activities and contracts with apple and other mobile communications companies they are on a steady rise finishing the day on £1.56 - around £3k as for as i am concerned. All good and more to come apparently. Nice.

Oh yeah. A while ago i mentioned that i had some bizarre searches that had led to my blog. The latest is pretty sick but funny too. Someone has ended up here by searching "Just naked children". It's as if he (or she?) is tired of finding sites with just a few naked kids on, "Tut! too many naked adults". He has used an advanced search to get just exactly when s/he wants. You sick monkey! But hey, thanks for reading.


Tuesday, July 17, 2007

Kick me when i'm down

I have just busted from the 20k guaranteed on Stars after playing 2 hands. I ran my Ax into a set and i knew it and basically played the hand bad. A third of my chipolatas gone.

Next hand. I am on the button with AQ off. There is a raise from a player 2 to my right. i think to reraise but call. The flop is A9x - with the ace of diamonds. I am raising when he bets but he checks. I bet 3/4 pot. He calls. The turn is like the 4 of diamonds. He checks. I move all in. Its excessive i know but i know he is drawing. He instantly calls. Seriously, in a flash, with KJ diamonds. Hmmm. River 3 diamonds.

I said both his calls were mental and he said he knew it was coming. I tell you. As if it is not enough that we have to deal with betting patterns, bad luck, cold runs, 2 outers, etc. Now we have to deal with players who think they know what is coming next. I admit, from time to time in my early days, i too sometimes knew it was coming. I will also admit to feeling a right cunt when it didn't and i had no chips left. Wp mate.

As is that wasn't enough i have just busted from a 180 on Stars after tangling with the guy who already has 7k in chips at level 1.

I have just observed the following things happen to this same guy;

1) hand 1 he flops a set and turns quads and gets most of the chips off the guy with top pr and another guy with an over pr.

2) Some guy bets all his chips on a 9 high flop into him after he has raised pre flop - opponent has J9 off, he has KK

3) He calls 900 or so all in with 66 - makes a boat beating A10

4) A limped pot - he checks to me on a J96 flop - i bet my 9 - he calls - turn 8 - he leads out small - i call - river 8 - he bets like 1/4 pot - i call - he has 68 for flopped bottom pair and runner runner FH

5) I limp in second with AA (ace of clubs) - several limpers - oops - flop KJx - 2 clubs - first to act bets - i raise - he calls - turn low club - i shove with over pr and noot floosh draw - he calls - shows KQ with the Q of clubs - nice - river Q diamonds

Someone said he had a load of outs to beat me including the clubs. I corrected him but said when a guy is going from bottom pair to runner runner full houses, who am i to try an put my measly aces in his way.

Unreal. GG me. GG him. GG PokerStars R(LOL)NG (on the floor laughing)

Sing "Sometimes it's hard to be....

....a poker player"

My God! I have no idea what the hell is going on. It seems to be a combination of factors but the result is, I have no idea how to play at the moment. I am caning through my bankroll at an alarming rate. My sharkscope is looking like Raymer's after some dude hacked his account and played with his dollars. I looked at my sharkscope this morning to see the words "SuperTilt". As i am playing more multi table sng's this does not worry me too much. Gone are the days of being labelled "Super Hot" as i storm the 6 seater, single table turbos!


Just wrote a load of shit and accidentally wiped it. I am steaming so much!!! I need to turn off the pokes or reduce myself to dollar buyins for the night. I am SHIT.

What i wrote and lost was basically saying that; to be frank, my play is embarrassing. I sit here night after night hour after hour laughing at the plays of the "idiots" (reference Nathan Barley) and yet here i sit for the last 3 days, destroying my bankroll as one of the biggest fish out there. There i have said it. I am a fish. Yes, I may have won 3x 180 man tourneys in 7 days earning $630+ profit. But right now that means shit as i swear, these last 3 days anyone could beat me. I don't know what to do.

A lot of people at low limits read a lot about poker, myself included and get carried away blaming a "sick run" or variance. But if we are honest, the reason we are flailing around helplessly at the low limits is due to holes in our game. Variance is something professionals allow for when they play near perfect poker. They expect that despite getting their money in with the best of it, this will not always be enough. Of course these outdraws happen to us too, but i fail to judge them as variance because i can admit that i am not always getting my money in with the best of it, nor am i consistently out playing my opponents. Although God only knows how i can't consistently beat these ass clowns.

Another thought like this is the idea of cash games versus tournament play. Books and articles offer the fact that in a cash game you can rebuy should you go broke. A lot of under rolled, low limit players read this and think that this is the way to go. The thing is, whilst reloading is clearly an option, the books and articles are more reference for a better player. You can reaload if you go broke, but this should be assuming you are out drawn rather than out played or out classed. If any pro was sat at a table where he was losing and felt he had no edge, he would be gone in a flash. If he was out drawn and rebought, then lost again but maintained that he had an edge, he would reload all night. I'm thinking more Negreanu's 6's full versus Gus's quads as oppose to Matusows daily blow ups! There are tonnes of players, myself once included, who are consistently spaffing money away because its so fucking easy to reload. They are not constantly outdrawn, but occasionally. More often than not they reload and remain at a table hoping "this (non existent) sick run" will end. More often than not when their variance kicks in, they will still lose their money rather than win it.

I'm sooo frustrated its unbelievable. Just placed 4th in a sng whilst writing this because i made an "obvious bluff" as a third party fish called it. However i fail to see how he could have called unless he held the pair that he did.

Now where did i put that gun...

Saturday, July 14, 2007

for any film fans...

I posted yesterday that i was watching Save the Green Planet by Stephen Chow. Whilst watching the film i became aware that it was nothing at all like the other films of his that i have seen. This is simply because what i said was in fact untrue. Whilst i was indeed watching this film, it would seem that Stephen Chow had nothing to do with the making of it. Save the Green Planet is in fact written and directed by Joon- Hwan Jang.

Steven Chow did however, write, direct and star in Kung Fu Hustle and Shaolin Soccer. Kung fu Hustle, as mentioned yesterday, must be seen.

Check in the Dark apologises to both Stephen Chow and Joon-Hwan Jang, both of whom are known to read this blog religiously. I hope that you can find it in your hearts to forgive me.

Friday, July 13, 2007

Well, well, well...

Good evening troops.

Just sitting around playing 'da pokes' and seeing what happens. I have had an up and down few days. As i posted recently, i had a few wins and then spooonked half of it up the cash game wall. I recouped a few dollars at William Hill, cashing out 40 quid leaving 20 still in. I won a couple of sng's and then lost more. I was profitable though. I did sit at a $25 cash table while my house mate was watching. I played about 3 hands in an hour and left with $60. Very fishy indeed. I am not rolled to play at these games but the truth of the decision was 2 fold. 1, the stats window in the lobby; it was a very loose table and the average pot was high. I thought/knew/hoped that sitting tight would reap rewards. And 2, does anyone else play better when they have someone watching them? I tend to have to explain situations aloud and thus analyse my own play. Definitely good for someone who tends to get splashy in too many pots - like me.

In other news. I have just placed first in another 180 for another $216. Yeah, yeah, just another $216. Ha! Its great news 'cos as you may or may not know i don't work properly at the moment, so its all welcome. I said that i would not cash any out as i wanted to build my BR up, but i did just take out $180/ £90, leaving me with over $200. The reason for this is that whilst i really do want to build a roll, at the same time i need money and was so angry at myself for spunking money away the other day, i would rather withdraw it and "bank" it than risk it. I withdrew it this time but will definitely win more bankroll contributions soon! Watch this space.

So i worked last Saturday for £175, withdrew £150 poker profit this week and am getting £220 to work tomorrow. For being a Pirate! Arrrrrrrr! Not a bad week - £545. I don't need more than that in a week. That amount per week more regularly would be nice though!

Sometimes i think my life is so dull. Other times, like this week. I fookin' love it!

reading - True and False - David Mamet (Book about being a better actor - work you see)
watching - Save the Green Planet - Steven Chow (also made the must see Kung Fu Hustle)
listening to - The Pussycat Dolls - (foxy bitches)

good luck everyone

Wednesday, July 11, 2007

Next one...

I had just taken a very big hit and was about half stacked - 700 or so.

Everyone limped and i raised all in with A7 off suit. I got called in 2 spots. A first position plater insta-called me ..."OH SHIT!".... as well as a mid position player.

The mid position flipped the monster that is Q7 suited or as it is known on the pro circuit "Old Faithful", ahem

The early limper - mother fucker - i didn't want to see those cards....hang on - he called with A3....off suit. Fuckin ace! i've got the best hand. It held and i won. Tripled up to over my starting stack.

Lets call Mr A3 "Genius" for the purpose of this next hand. Which incidentally was the very next hand.

I limp and complete with J10.

Genius raises in the bb - raises to about 500. I did have 600 - now i have 1600 - so i feel like i'm free rolling and call. I love the hand anyway. The flop is nice. 88T - i check raise him all in.

He insta calls with....

A7 diamonds. I shit you not, ladies and gentlemen

Turn 6

River 9 - creating the most improbable straight since....well since last time i posted about an improbable suck out.

Whilst writing this, in another tourney, i just moved all in from the sb and got called by first position who had 83 off suit.

A few minutes later - i had raised pre flop with A9 of hearts. We had checked down a board which finally read


I made a small bet with my ace, confident i was ahead. He called and mucked. I asked what he called with. He didn't speak. He is probably licking his cat or eating a faeces sandwich or something. So i checked the hand history. He called with J8 off suit.

This is what is so tough about playing these levels. If you play an hand strong you could just as easily run into AK or 83. Its that simple.

Don't even think that guy is calling for information either people. This is stupidity at its basest level. When can i play higher limits.


Lol - all in with the best hand and suffer back to back suck outs to bust out - aments


What do these idiots think they are doing.

It is just coming up to the first break in the 20k guaranteed on Stars. I have about 6300 chips and the average is about 5k.

Everyone folds and the player to my right raises. I call with QT off suit.
flop KxQ - 2 spades.
he bets - could mean anything - i call
turn 10 spades - 2 pr me and i know i have gone ahead. This is further clarified for me by his desperate and unnecessary all in. I call.
He has KJ hearts. Lovely.
River - 9 -gives him the straight and half my chips.

That was the last hand before the break. I hate going into the break having lost a stack. Hey ho.

First hand back.

My Nemesis raises the minimum bet in early position. To me this means a weak hand that he wants to see a cheapish flop with A10/middle pair. I have 99 and i know i am ahead and just shove it all in. He folds when it arrives back to him but not before another player had called for all his chips. Fook. Race on.

Cards on their backs. Pocket sevens?! Erm...np...?

The flop was Kx7 - and that was that.

ALL HIS CHIPS - 77- then he "lol"'d in the chatbox, the classless cunt. So i unleashed a small but intellectual verbal bashing upon him. He said "ok you can rest now". At that point i let fly with the "R" rated version.

Laters. I'm off to play tourneys until my eyes fall out or my bankroll is gone.

GG muppets

Tuesday, July 10, 2007

Today i gave a lot of my winnings to charity!

That charity being the ever needy succession of players at the low limit poker tables. I played some triple draw and misread a hand, lost 1 stack. There was an idiot player at the table who kept moving all in pre flop. I waited for genuine hands then could only draw aces and hit pairs. 2 and 3 stacks.

I logged off for a while and came back later to play some cash (I had won 4 buyins already this morning) and just wanted to repair some of the triple draw damage. 3 and 4 stacks in very quick succession. The first was against a very aggressive player who was hitting everything, i should have known better, but refused to fold my A on an A high flop - he had AK. I see him call all in pre flop w A10 and lose to KK so i know he is wreckless. I have 56 and call in mid/late position, he calls too. The flop comes Q56. Beautiful. I bet - he raises. I pause and shove - he calls. He has Q5 for a flopped higher 2 pr.

I recover 1 buyin when i hit an ace high flush and he cant pass KK with the K high flush.

I then revel in watching him lose the $100 stack he has accumulated back to the table. Every red cent. No more to me however.

Later i call a raise in late position with J10. There is just me and the raiser to the 10 high flop. He bets i call. I narrow him to over cards or an over pr. He fires again on the turn. I call. The river is a 10! He bets i raise. He moves all in (i see this all the time here with an over pair they cant let go of) i call - he has A10. FUK!

So in that hand, between the 2 players heads up and the board, we had all the 10's in the deck. Earlier we had shared 3 of the decks 4's and aces prior to this. Arse.

So i have hugely dented my stackage.

The good news? There are tourneys starting all the time. Woo.

I also played some cash on William Hill today having singned up to them through Gatsby's blog and rake offer. I was playing much better and was way ahead on the full ring cash table. I sat with £15 - left with £53 after what felt like an hour. Just played tight and my good hands better than others. I cashed out £20 which is £5 more than i deposited. This means my actual bank account shows a profit (£5!) on the day, and although my online BR took a heavy blow i think it is easily recoverable.

Good luck ma homies

Monday, July 09, 2007

3pm and all's well

Hey gang

I thought this was going to be a bit of a sad post as after hitting $322 the other day i went on a moronic rampage yesterday. I played short handed, full tables, mtt's and sng's and cash. I literally played all day and won fuck all. I must have gone through about $80. I was playing bad, calling with weak hands pre flop and not letting go when i hit the flop in some way. On top of this i lost all the races and missed all my draws. I was annoyed with myself and clearly tilted but couldn't stop. At one point yesterday i logged off Pokerstars and immediately fired it up again to play 2-7 triple draw there were no tables available so i played a few HU games instead.

The reason this is not a sad post is because like any addict, when i woke up this morning i fired up the laptop just wanting to play "The Poke". I saw a 180 - $4.40 was almost full so i joined. I only went and won the fucker! Unbelievable. $216 ship it.

I went chip leader with about 90 left but not by along way. By the time we were getting to the bubble i was about 11th -15th and not planning on bubbling. A few all in's with everyone folding served me well. Down to 2 tables i lost a crucial pot for half my shortish stack. A player limped in first. He was short and rather than seeing a trap i saw weakness. When it came to me i had AK and moved all in. He paused for ages which is good news for me. He called with QT off suit. Ha! The flop was much less amusing than the call giving him trip tens and the turn a Q for the "salt in wounds" full house. Muppet.

I head into the final table last and seriously low. I had 6k to the chip leaders 39k. The next stack to me had 25k. I was just going to raise and try to double up using cards and/ or position. I picked up the blinds and then lost a huge pot which left me crippled.

There was a raise in first, a newly short stack moves all in. I am on the button with AK and move all in. First calls and shows nearly the worst hand he could have - AK. We are up against 33 which holds. I think its over but we split a small side pot to leave me with just over 2k. The bb is 1200 for fucks sake. I move all in whatever my next hand is. Its 98 and i'm all in. Two players call. The flop is a beautiful 89T with 2 hearts. There is a bet and a fold and i see i am up against A7. I hold and triple up. 10k

I hang around, slightly less desperate and push with A3. I make a heart flush which beats my caller foir a 20k pot.

I get some severely needed breathing room when i am in the bb with a pretty looking 63 diamonds. There are 4 limpers to me. Nice one. The flop is 477. If i could just catch a 5 i'll have a well disguised straight. Amazingly i get a free card. """"5"""" Amazing. I check and late position bets. I raise al in - he calls with A4 off suit (?). I take it

I now have 40k and seriously think there is a chance i can win.

I pick up good pots by reraising all in pre flop with AK and 99 forcing the aggressors to fold.

It's now 6 handed and the game dries up. Raises are rarely called and it is a very serious game of poker. I know something has to give- (it's usually me) - there is a lot of blind stealing going on. I call a raise from the shortest stack with A10 spades in the bb. I check the Q high flop to him. He bets small. I know he hasn't got it so i raise him all in. He "lol"'s and folds. I told him i had AQ and he said "nice check" i thanked him. Nice.

I am now chip leader with 77k but it's tight at the top.

Down to 3 and the lead is switching between us.

Then a monster developed in the blinds. The button strangely folds and i raise the bb with 86 diamonds. He calls. The flop is Jx8. I be and he calls. The turn is an amazing 6. I move all in and he calls with J10. Bootiful.

I am now on 155k with double 2nd place.

I hands later i raise the button with 22. I am reraise by the sb, the guy i just beat with the 68. I think and move all in. He calls with AJ and i flop a set.

HU with 200k to 60k

We exchange blinds for 3 hands. Then i raise with 67. He calls. The flop is 6J7. I bet, he raises all in and i call. I avoid jax and tens and seal another one.

So the thing i MUST learn. Is don't fucking play when you know you are playing like a retard. You'll play too many games. Play then badly and undo all the hard work in a flash.

It's tough to win money. It's too easy to lose it. Listen to your heads people.

BR = $441
Sharkscope profit = $904
ROI = 14%

Check back

I have just completed a draft post and it has gone in the "June" section. Its funny as fook. I can say that cos it's pasted in and not my writing. Check it out. It has a Zoolander quote as the title.

Saturday, July 07, 2007

"Just when I thought that I was out they pull me back in" Michel Corleone - The Godfather Pt III

It wasn't that long ago that i was thinking of quitting online poker, but as you know i have been running well of late and i have just capped it by winning a $4.40 - 180. Its been on the cards for sometime with several late finishes. As i reported live from the "virtual felt" yesterday i said that my BR was $110, up from $70 on the same day. Having arrived home from an easy days work today i hit 1 for 1 and my "roll" is now $322.


I was playing good from the start and with tomorrows big tourney in mind I thought, "lets just see how well i can run here and how long i can last".

Some key hands

There was a raise in early position and i put him on a decent hand with no other info to go on. I had AK on the button and was going to reraise but i was reading the blog of Mr Amatay recently and he said, regarding cash play, that he was not getting too excited pre flop. So i just called to see what the flop brought. The flop came a nice AA5 with 2 spades and he bets 50 into me - the minimum bet. I paused and then raised here. First i want to know if he indeed has a weaker ace and second i want more money in this pot and calling 50's isn't gonna do it. He called the raise. The next card was a blank and again the 50 was bet. This time i thought i'll pause and call showing a bit of weakness? The river didn't change much and he bet larger and i raised nicely but not too big, he called with QQ. Lol at giving me no credit! ME!

Then it just went mental and i scooped about a billion smallish pots. I raised on some sooted connectors and won the blinds. How nice it is to have stolen like this and then to pick up a real hand right after. I got QQ, still in late position. Raise standard 3xbb - rarely do i deviate from this actually. A short stack moved in, i called he had some "ace/pants" hand. Nice

I was last to act in a limped pot with KJ and the flop came Jxx. It was checked to me - so i bet. Obviously. First position moved all in. There is no way I am beat here and correctly put him on a worse J. He shows J3. Hilarious. Yum yum more chips.

There were many more smallish pots before...

I am in the bb with A8 diamonds. There is an over raise on the button which i call. The flop is a AJx. I check and he over bets this. This confirms my suspicions. I think he is weak and move in he calls all in with 55. Mmmmm.

A guy at the opposite side of the table has been mixin it up a bit and i call a good sized raise from him on the button with AT. The flop is an almost perfect ATx with 2 spades. He is first to act and moves all in. Its a mad bet and i have 2 pr. Easy call. He has AQ hearts and i win a packet.

We are down to 27 and i have 30k. The average is 10k. Woo! Feelin good and focused.

No real highlights from this period and i had to pass some strong hands and just picked up and dropped small chips. By the time the final table rolled up i was around 4th or so.

9th and 8th busted soonish which is always welcome. Then it went a bit pear shaped for me. I saw 72 about 3 times and 52/53 more times than i can remember.

I raised AK and laid it down to heavy action on a low flop.

Active player raised in early. I reraise strong with AK in mid. One of the blinds flat calls. EEk! The original raiser folds. The flop is low - he leads out betting over half the pot. I have nothing and fold. He told me he had Aces. Woo. Escaped. No king flopping - thankyou!

A similar thing happened later with another player telling me AA after i folded. I was like "yeah yeah ok" But i had nothing, so got away cheap anyway.

I completed the sb with 97 and the flop came X97. I was against the aggressive chip leader in the bb. I checked and he checked. (Doh!). The turn was a T. I checked he bet. Here we go! I moved all in. He thought and called. He has T6. He he. Double up and into second place.

I then picked up some semi good hands and got the blinds and minimal action.

A moster pot occurred with 3 left. I raised the button with 66. The sb, the aggressive player moved all in. I knew this wasn't necessarily strength and i was willing to gamble. He showed A8 off suit. Hmmm. I held. A FOOKIN MAZIN. And i go top for the first time for a while.

Raised the button w JJ and "aggression" called. The flop was a bootiful J10x with 2 diamonds. He check called a decent bet. The turn was a Q. I bet very strong. This was a mistake on my part i think. This Q could have meant i was far ahead or way behind and if i was wrong i was fooked. He paused long and i realise i'm ahead and i'm just saying "call... call". Well... i reckon he lives next door and heard these messages and folded! Poop!

By now 3rd place has less than a third of my chips and i am repeatedly folding to his all ins. I pick up 22. Not the best - but i call and hold against his AQ off suit.


UNBELIEVABLE!!!! Should have been over on the third hand.

I raise the button with 47 diamonds. He calls. The flop is an angelic 563 rainbow. I'm like "I love you!". He checks - i bet - he moves all in. LOOOOLLLOLOLOLOLO

He shows 75 clubs. All in with a 5 - 7 kicker. I laugh. The turn is a K and the river.......


4 - SPLIT POT!!!!!!


I say nothing and crack on. I am severely narked though and almost tilt it off when I double him up the next hand by limping with A2. He raises, lol obviously. I move all in. He calls and hits 2 pair with A10. FOOK

I am in a tough spot now and even though i have got 60k left he is reraising my raises and i am passing. I figure that i know what an average hand is so i am pushing anything above this.

I pick up K9 and when he limps i move all in. He calls with Q3 clubs (erm...?) I hold and double up.

Back to roughly equal.

The next hand is sick. For him! LOL. I check with Q4 diamonds. The flop is Q high and he leads out. He could be doing this with any pair. I move all in. He calls and shows Kings. I can't believe it! And can only hope. Hope is rewarded and i river a 2 outer and hit my Queen! Amazing! In my mind that makes up for that crazy split pot earlier.

I now have about 5.5x his chips and the very next hand I limp the button with 99. He moves all in - I call - He has A7 and there is no help for you tonight young man!

I played very well and obviously got lucky at times. My hands held up more often than not but i was never all in until the final table. I obviously got extremely lucky with that Q on the river, but the way I see it, he got extremely lucky to survive earlier against a made straight, never mind one pair, and it should have been over then. Its just nice not to have to crash out and wait for Mr Variance to reward you another day.

Well, good luck my loves. Stay focused and strong. I truly believe this blog is helping my play and just hope it continues.

BR - $322
Sharkscope - Profit - $726
ROI -12%

The Beatles once said "its getting better all the time"

Today i got up really late which was totally not the plan as i have got to be up for work in the morning. Yes that's right, i have a day of work booked. 175 quids for three hours in Aylesbury. It would be rude not to. I sometimes work as an entertainer performing as characters for corporate clients or private functions and parties. Tomorrow i am a stilt walking giant/ BFG character for kids at the Roald Dahl museum should be a laugh, it usually is.

As for the poke. I was not feeling the sng vibe so i sat at a cash table. Given that my "roll", such that it is has now built to the heady heights of $70, i thought i would play a bit of cash now that i could afford to lose a tenner here and there. Anyway I'm glad i made that decision. Ha! What a hilarious donkey festival that is. I used to play cash all the time and the 25/50NL tables on party was where i had my most success. Since bankroll/money problems and no job i have reduced volatility by not playing them . I sat down thinking i would play tight aggressive. I had no problem laying down nice hole cards if it didn't develop well but i would raise any hand i wanted to play pre flop. This was a standard raise for all pairs 22-AA and from all suited conns 56 upwards. I literally just played the cards and the board and left about half an hour later having tripled my buy in - happy days!

I played a couple of multi table sng's tonight and have just finished first in one where i shouldn't have even cashed. I was looking at pictures of Claire Forlani on the internet. All clothed and above board (grrr, more's the pity lol) and suddenly my table popped up and i accidentally selected to reraise all in!

I was in the bb and there were a couple of limpers. The button made a decent raise, the sb reraised all in, now i reraised over the top of him and the button called. Eeek! I looked at my hand to see the pitiful and embarrassing 25 off suit! The sb turned over K7 clubs and the button, pocket rockets. Fook.

The flop came 355 - Ha! I held and tripled up. I apologised to the "ace man" and he was cool. Like a mystical Obi Wan he advised me to use my chips wisely.

I reraised a playa all in with AQ, he paused and called with AJ. I'd flopped a ten (top pair) and called a fools unnecessary bluff. I called the now very active "ace mans" all in with JQ out flopping his A8 off suit. Down to heads up, I just put him all in nearly every hand as by that time the chip counts were me 22,000 him 1000. Lol.

This takes my current BR on Stars to $110. My Sharkscope, which was once in shatters, to a $514 profit with an ROI of 6% and rising. I checked my OPR earlier too which scores me at something like 80% and places me about 30,000th of 280,000 players on the Pokerstars Network. As it goes at the moment i am happy with my performance and these tools being available online serve to keep me in check with myself.

So thats cash games back on track, full ring stt's are good, multi sng's good, short handed (inc turbo) good. The only thing that i am really hankering for is a decent MTT win. If that were to happen i think i would soil myself!

...And Finally

You may know that Stars runs a tourney at midnight (GMT) for a $10+1 buy in with a guaranteed prize pool of 15k. First is usually $4.5-5k. There are 15 minute levels with 3000 starting chips. Good value despite 2k+ runners (better than the lottery). Now they have introduced a tourney at 7pm which is again the same buy in, the same guarantee but 10 minute levels with 1500 chips.

BUT.... BUT, they are now starting a low buy in to run alongside their big Sunday tournies with 100k guaranteed! A slice of $100k for $11? How can you not be in this? I looked at the lobby today there are already over 13,000 people signed up. Madness, but i will be there. Oh yes. I will be there.

Good luck everyone

Thursday, July 05, 2007

Nice one

Just a quicky.

Last night after posting i played a $5, 45 man sng opn stars in which i played shit at he start but then pulled it back and finished second. I always seem to donk chips at the start of tournies and often bust making myself desperate too early. The other option is that i sit up, focus and sort is out. I really need to make sure i don't lie down and play. Anyway the final table play was laughable and i was zoned and took down the $48 for second place. Incidentally i got all the money in with the best hand but it didn't hold.

Today i played a few $5 sng's without cashing but then came second in and 18 man sng for $27. Feeling pretty good about it all and am thinking about sticking around in these for a while. I was trying to get to a certain amount built in the 3 dollar 6 man turbo's. I will stay play these but i am definitely getting easily frustrated playing them and although i cash more often than not i don't take them at all seriously. I think the slightly higher doesn't risk much more and can increase potential earning speed.

I am just in the 15k on stars while i write this. Just had JJ -3 times in 13 hands. One laid down after my continuation bet was called on an A high flop and 2 double ups.

The first was resisting the temptation to reraise with JJ in the sb. I called the late position raise and the flop came 10 high. The flop was 10 high with 2 spades. I checked with the intention of raising the flop. I checked, he bet and i flat called instead. The turn was a J but a spade. We went check check. The river was a beautiful 10. I bet out - he raised strong. I paused for ages, doing my best "is my low flush good here acting". I raised eventually and he called with the nut flush and i took it down.

The second was deciding to reraise from an early position raiser. He instantly moved all in and i knew he had AK. Now my reaction of old is call. My new reaction is fold. Its early days and we would be racing. But then i was just compelled to call thinking i had the best hand, all be it marginal. I was correct and i took his chips too.

As i was writing that paragraph i just busted believe it or not. I became tilted by another player which is quite unusual for me. This clown raised it to 600 pre flop with the blinds as 25/50. Everyone folded and he showed QQ. He then moved all in about 5 hands running either pre or on the flop. Then he and i were involved in a hand. He limped (1), another limper (2), a raise in late (3), i called in the bb with AJ. The flop was A high with 2 clubs. I wanted to find a bigger ace now if i had to and i led out. 1 called, 2 folds and 3 raises on the short stack and is all in. I call, 1 calls. The turn is a 3rd club. I check to him and he moves all in. I am forced to fold and they showdown (1) A7 off suit, one pair (3) has 333 and wins. If i had played that hand i would have lost the small main pot but won a huge one against him, had loads of chips and busted that cunt.

The next hand he raises and someone calls. A late position player raises all in. Quite a substantial raise. He instantly calls as does the other player. The cards on their backs. Main raiser AQ clubs, second player , the caller has 75 off suit. Our man crazy has the monster A2 off suit. Turn 2, river 2. Nearly triples up.

Later i limp a pot just to try and catch this fool out. No action.

He raises early, i have AJ and move all in, convinced i am ahead of whatever shit he has. He insta calls with 1010. A low board and i am out.

Really fucked off he bothered me too much. I would have never played this hand like this against anyone else. I just hated his play and wanted him gone. I definitely could have called, seen and flop, folded and lived to take his chips another day.

Good luck everyone.

Oh yeah, just saw Roman Polanski's Oliver Twist. Not great but Sir Ben Kingsley as Fagin is AWESOME.

Wednesday, July 04, 2007

15k guaranteed

Pathetic attemptSo little to report. Dripped chips like i knew nothing about the game.

Was at about 2k after starting with 3. Pick up QQ in first position. Double up ahoy!

I limp- so does every other fooker

flop dangerous 533 w 2 clubs. I check and will see what happens next. I have no problem throwing this away now depending on the action.

Its good news - one guy bets strong and everyone else folds.

I read it perfectly and move all in - he calls on the 2 club and 335 flop - from a check raiser - a limper from first position - with A5 of hearts.

The turn is an A and i'm out.

I can only laugh and vent here. What else could i do?

Channel 4/5 Party sponsored programmes

I really love watching poker on TV however heavily or badly edited it may be. I would prefer to be honest that they made unedited long final table programmes also available as an alternative so you could see how the pro's handle more "small" hand situations or those when they flop nothing etc.

The thing that really fooks me off is with the Party Poker programmes. I think Jesse May is a good commentator but, BUT, we are not watching the show to listen to him and Padraig Parkinson talking bollocks and giggling like a pair of muppets. We are not there for them at all. I hate the way that there are pro's at the table discussing hands, giving invaluable insight into their technique and personalities and we are forced to listen to these idiots. The added annoyance here is that the programme on so late that if you turn the volume up to hear the pro's, the people we all want to play like, those two ass clowns just get louder.


BTW - winning shit all today. Deposited some money on Will Hill through the deal on Gatsby's blog (link right) and played some of the tournies he plays in and cashes in so regularly. I was clearly no fit for a new site (although i really liked it) nor was i ready for the donkfest that developed. I lost a little bit playing Omaha and then busted out of 3, 2 dollar tournies. The good news is they are cheap and start regularly and have about a third of the runners to a Stars tourney. Bad news was the play really. I folded so much after raising as there was an all in and 12 calls in front of me. Hey ho. I'm sure on those its all about playing tight aggressive and really picking your spots. I think i'll have more cashes in tournies of that size.

Good luck everyone

The Fountain

If you enjoy the feeling of your brain being fucked but cannot afford the drugs, you could do a lot worse then nipping down to your local Blockbuster and renting The Fountain, the most recent film from Darren Aronofsky.

The film stars Hugh Jackman and Rachel Weitz and centres around their relationship in three separate stories or states of existence. These periods are the present day or the 21st century where he is a scientist attempting to make a medical advancement that could cure the tumour in her brain. The second is 16th century Spain, he is a conquistador warrior type and she a princess. The third is set in the future where he is shaved head tattooed man living in what is essentially some kind of garden of Eden inside a "bubble- esque" space ship.

The story had a non linear narrative and, whist sometimes difficult to follow, was possibly one of the most original and beautiful films i have seen in a long time. I knew it was good when i started watching it after i played poker last night. It was about 5am but my brain, although tired, was still on the poker edge. I needed to relax and fall asleep so put a film on. By 5.30 i was propped up on one elbow, staring wide eyed at the screen just kind of mesmerised. When it had finished i then watched some of the extras until one of my eyeballs popped out of my head, turned to look at me and screamed "GO TO SLEEP YOU CRAZY BASTARD" so i did.

I would strongly urge all of you to watch it and make sure you watch the excellent extras. Whilst in Blockbuster or your local independent (pfff, yeah right) check out his other films "Pi" and the outstanding and haunting "Requiem For a Dream".

Fookin brilliant

Played till wayee too late

So, bleeding eyes and all i sat down at a $4.40, 180 on stars after posting last night. What seemed like an eternity later i busted in 7th for $24. Fookin feel like a millionaire these days. Once again i will say i should have done better. My 99 lost to A2 off suit (humph) and i went into the final table towards the bottom of the tree.

I decided once again to make some push plays once we were down to 8. I managed to induce some folds and then my A10 was called by K10. I am happy to report that despite this event taking place on Stars the flop did not come KKK and i was able to double up to go second. This put everyone on about equal standings.

We didn't wee a flop for about a year, everything was decided pre flop and this got even worse when the blinds were 1k/2k and everyone was on about 30k. Some guy won a load after calling a reraise all in w AJ and hitting the A against the reraisers KK. it was to be this "ace catcher" that would be my undoing.

I lost a good chunk after trying to steal the blinds and getting reraised and having no real hand to call with call with. I moved up a gear again and would begin making all in moves with the Sklansky/ Kill Phil hands. This worked well as everyone was obviously eager to make more money. I did too but i'd rather give myself the best chance to win it all.

On my final hand, after not seeing anything higher than a Q for what seemed like ages, i raised all in w "ace catchers" hand of AJ only to find a divine role reversal, with "ace catcher" having pocket kings. As he was in charge of "ace floppage" he obviously didn't give me one and i am gone.

What i learned - I could have been more patient at the final table. Especially in retrospect of that AJ with players still to act after me. I should have payed more attention to the fact that despite blinds it is still the equivalent of an STT and should have played tighter. I had actually thought i was doing a good thing here though by going against the general flow of the otherwise tight table. Alas, the win once again eludes me.

My most recent standings in these look like this. It's better but not good enough.
1 - 7th
2 - 121st
3 - 12th
4 - 14th
5 - 116th
6 - 172nd
7 - 20th

Interesting fact at the table. I ran everyone through Official Poker Rankings - there was a player at the table, i was going to mention his name, but i won't. He has won over 18k in prizes but has a negative profit. Pretty sick. I don't want to be in that spot should i get a couple of wins in the bag.

Tuesday, July 03, 2007

What goes up....

Its not much, but i placed 1st in 4 out of 4 in the low limit 6 handed turbo's on stars today for a $30 clear profit. Lets also not forget that is TAX FREE people! Woot!

Seeing how i was running so hot, i decided to enter the Stars midnight $10+1, 15k guaranteed (I was going to enter anyway, tee hee) and then I proceeded to get royally bummed. Nothing wrong with the way it went down, but just feel like a fishy for donking off all 3000 chips and lasting a whopping 27 minutes.

What went on -

I hadn't seen a hand really and so was still on 3k.

Lots of limpers so i am in mid pos with Q9 deemonds.

back round to the blinds and one of them makes it 90. Already in for 30 so its a no brainer after everyone else puts in.

Flop J76 with 2 diamonds.

Raiser bets, next position raises strong. I look at his chips. It says 1500. I move all in on that basis. Overcard, flush draw, runner runner straight draw possiblities.

As i suspected raiser folds.

Reraiser calls - 66 - flopped set 666

Ok race is on



Race is over - he has quads - balls

River 3 diamonds- giving me the flush - just to thoroughly take the piss.

Worse than this was that the 1500 he had, hadn't accounted for his strong reraise - ie, he had 500 on top of as well - so i'm left with 600.

Very next hand i have 44

one limper is in for *THIRTY*

I move all in 600

All fold to him

He must think "oh well its only *FIVE HUNDRED AND SEVENTY MORE*"

Calls with 88

Time to get lucky.....GO

Flop 387


Ho hum. Not disheartened. Just once again reminded that i often get into trouble by playing like a crazy mo fo in the early stages where all i can do is lose the tournament. As long as i keep remembering to learn this stuff it has to become habit eventually. Doesn't it?

A little bit of something, a $4.40 maybe, and then bed. My eyes are sore!

Good luck everybody

Monday, July 02, 2007


I have played at least 4 - 4.40 - 180's on stars the last 2 days and been first in 3 of them and then not even final tabled. Finishing 20th - not even cashing. 15th ish and 14th.

In the most recent we were still in the first level - blinds 10/20 and i had amassed 11,260 in chips, The average was 1901.

How i got there;

saw a raise all in from a short stack - called by someone else - i raise all in - the caller - surprisingly - calls - the cards are me AK - caller Q8 spades - raiser 96 off suit.

Called a raise and someone moved all in - raiser folds i call with AK - he shows AA and i win... never happened to me before with those hands clashing.

I called a small raise in the bb with 24 clubs - flop Q24 - i move all in - he calls with KK

For an hour after that i really didn't play any significant hands only picking up and losing blinds. Had no cards and what i had missed the flops.

By level 7 i had lost 2k and was hanging about 9k.

At that level i see a raised pot multiway with A6 spades. The flop is KJx with 2 spades. I decide we are playing and raise the raiser all in. He thinks for a month and calls with QQ. Crying call IMHO. Ace on the turn and its over for him.

I'm back to third.

Pick up AA and Mr Allin does his job. I just raise to isolate and take 4k off him.

I have 20k and the average is 10k.

I feel good when i fold A10 in first despite my stack only to see an all in, a call, a reraise all in and a call. God knows where i might have ended up in all that.

Not sure what happened next but i got reraised when i had 1010 - felt good about it and played it. happy to see an over played AJ off suit. Not happy to see JJ on the turn and river.

Last hand. I limp AA in first. Flop JJK - sb bets - i call - turn Q hrts - bets i call - river K - bets i call - like a cunt... i know.

And i'm fucked.

I am just an absolute plank who, in my opinion has thrown away a potential $600 in winnings and ended up with $8 because i fell 3 times at the final hurdle.

The only upside in all this "Swimmingpool" has just come on the telly. My god she is fit!

(For those of you who didn't click the link, i mean the girl not the old author woman!)

Good luck you lot

Sunday, July 01, 2007


Just posed a question on EV and someone said to look here. I was very grateful until i saw what it was but then couldn't help being grateful anyway cos it cheered me up.

Good luck all and thanks for dropping by!

At 3am last night, I'm gutted. Again

Well hello there folks.

Last night I played in the $10+1 - $15k guaranteed on Stars. There were over 2200 runners and a first place prize of over $4500. In this event in the past i have braved that field to finish 80th and 12th in (successive days) for a $180 profit. Last night i went back to my old stomping ground. I did not cash restored a bit of faith in myself. (A bit low after no cash recently, no jobs, no auditions and reading UKGatsby's blog who only had to pay the buy in to an MTT and he makes it to the money. ;-) Just jealous, very impressive, and a good read.) Finishing just outside the money at 250th. It paid to 225. I could have hung on but i would have been blinded off and i was not
interested in just scraping into the money. Shit or bust, as we say.

(incidentally, they have increased the starting stacks from 1500 to 3000 with the same 15 minute levels. I think despite the size of the field, for 5 quid, how can you not have a pop at winning 5k?)

The edited highlights (and lowlights) go a bit like this.

Level 1 - KK - I reraised pre flop and reraised a bet on a low flop. He folds.

Level 2 - AK diamonds - Maniac is making regular over bets and all in plays pre flop. I have AK diamonds in the sb. He raises 800 - (the bb is 30). I believe i have a better hand and move all in he calls and shows JJ. Much better than expected but the K high flop gives me an early double up.

I managed to steal a few pots here and there through others being weak and having position. Nice when it works isn't it. People were playing generally quite tight. Raises with A4, A8, 58 all claimed the blinds. Unfortunately so did JJ, AK etc.

Interesting hand. I call a small raise in the sb with K10 diamonds and lead out on a J10x flop (with the J of diamonds) I bet, he min raises and i call. The turn is the ace of diamonds giving me the royal flush draw with any Q, J, 10, or diamond to win i check raise him all in and he folds.

Lose an annoying pot which i should never have hung around in. It was between me in the BB and villain the SB. The pot was unraised and by the river we had both made a FH, his was better than mine. The pot was too big and i shouldn't have even hung on.

We go into the first break having lost nearly 1000 players.

There are 1305 remaining

Average chips 5206

My chips 6110

After the break

Pocket Jax on the button with 2 limpers. I raise larger than normal to compensate. 2 limpers bot call. Flop is a scary QQ9- with 2 diamonds. (Hey, its Pokerstars. You know one has 99 and the other Q9..!) But no, they check to me and the bet takes it down#

again 1010 takes it down uncontested

Pocket 8's in the bb - there is a raise in first and a call in second. I go to raise and it probably would have been the best play considering his holding. I give credit to his position and call. The flop is a nice one 1075. I think anyone would like that with pocket 8's. I check to him and he bets, 2nd position folds, i just call. I am giving him 2 overs here so perhaps i should have raised right there. The 4 on the turn gives me the pair and the gutshot straight draw. I again check call. The river unfortunately isnt the 6...its the 8. Amazing. I bet about half his remaining chips and he calls. He actually had A10 off suit. I am surprised and was very nearly fucked. However i'm not and i now have a good amount of chipolatas.

That hand put me on 13k with the average still at 6k. Put me in 66th place.

Took a few more blinds with K10, AQ, A4,

I lost a chunk when i called a raise in position with 55 and was then squeezed by an all in from the blinds and folded. The hands were AK against QQ.I would have lost. Obvious fold but nice to see their cards were better.

I reraise the button with 44 as a shortish stack has raised in mid position. The bb goes all in he has a lot less chips than me. We all get it in my 44 takes the side pot from the mid raisers AQ and the blinds JJ takes the main pot.

I now have 11k with the average at 9 - they're closing...

Now level 8 and although my stack is above average, with the blinds as they are a raise of three times the bb is over 10% of my stack. I want to make some moves...


Big stack raises in early. I am calling him. Before that though a smaller stack goes all in. I call and the big man calls. The flop is JJ7. I check to him. He bets small - i call. We check it down and the hands are; me - AQ - Big - 33 Small - AA. Whoops. My instinct given my recent desire to make a move was to move all in pre flop. So although i lost a chunk here, it could have been much worse.

Lots off limpers. I collect when i move all in with A4.

I raise and get called (yikes) in 2 spots. I have A6. The flop is a scary KJx. It checked to me and i take it.

Back to 12k and above average.

2nd break

525 remaining

Average 12942

Me 12020

Now the binds and antes are 1500 so couple of steals for a nice 3k

Someone raises just double the bb. I call from the bb with Q6. (Is this an automatic call in this spot with any 2 cards?) The flop is Q high all spades. I check raise the flop with the Q and the 6 of spades. He folds.

One limper in early. I raise AK. All fold.

Now 18k average 14

Call 3x bb raise in the bb with A9 hearts. The flop is nasty. 63K (one heart). I check to him and i am shocked and suspicious to see it checked as well. The turn is the 6 of hearts. Now if he has flopped a set things have got a lot better for him. If he hasn't, its a great card for me. I bet and he smooth calls. Arrrgh(?) The river is the 10 of hearts. Gives me the nut flush but 44 levels from the nuts. I pause. I love the flush card but not the board. I bet and he has selected auto fold Phew. Much easier than expected.

Up to 24k average 16 and i've doubled up since the break (less than 1/2 an hour)

The next hand i raise with K9 suited in late position. The button pauses and raises all in. I'm getting over 3 to 1 and I call. Pretty shitty to look at the rockets. Ho hum! The flop could be worse giving me the 9. The turn seals it with another 9! Cant fucking believe it. This does not happen to me!

Up to 33k

Few hands later i pick up AA in early. There is a limper and i am pretty sure i am due some "Poker God Retribution". I raise 4x the bb.They all fold.

40k average 19k I'm up 28k in 33 minutes.

One limper in late and i raise the button - he calls. I have 66. The flop is QKx. He checks i bet he calls. The turn is and x. It goes check check. The river is an ace he checks, i bet - what else can i do? - again he calls - shows pocket 10's. Ok, he won the hand but i hate the way he played it. He is behind to so many hands and at no point does he show any strength or desire to win the pot. Cost me a lump of chips the fucker. Reminds me of one of my pet hates in the game; the players who limp for whatever reason (but not to trap like AA in first, limping with a mind to reraise, that's a different play) and then call your all in. With hands like AQ to A8, 99 down to 66. You know what i mean. They didn't want to bet to eliminate the limpers or get information because common opinion says to get in cheap and see a flop. They're like "ok ok, cheap flop, call. Oh he's gone all in. I've got a pair. Call" Dumb asses.

The next hands see huge action where i would have flopped a flush and the next hand where, had i stayed, my 63 would have cracked QQ and AJ. Obviously correct plays by me in the long term but in the day 30k i could have had which would have put me top 10.

Nasty pot. I raised 88 and called a shorter stacks all in with over 2 to 1 odds. He has KQ and hits both of them. I was thinking today "should i have passed?" as that hand did represent the start of my undoing. But i think; (1) I was actually ahead when the money went in. And(2) i was getting the odds. So, although i lost a big chunk i cant help but think it was correct. The only thing i will say is that i knew it was a gamble hand so could have saved 7k or whatever it was to call. I lost 15k that hand.

Then i moved tables and am looking at everyones chips and see that as per usual they have put me right nest to a huge stack with over 3x my chips. He is currently 5th.

It folds to me and i raise his bb with my ace small. He moves all in. I have to fold.

I have 20k - grrrr

There is a raise and a call in front of me. I call with A7 suited (it is 3k to go) the flop is A10x - 2 clubs. The first player checks. Second bets. I am stuck. I feel I am behind but have top pair and it just goes through my head that why did i play this had if not to hit the ace. I can't just expect to flop the flush draw and be done with it. So i pause and move all in. This nearly works as the bettor has a long think before making the correct call with AQ.

I am out in 250th, just outside the money. Balls.

I will say this though. I was donking off cash at the low limits all day yesterday and I actually prepared for this tournament. I sat up properly, got a drink, hadn't played for a few hours up until that point, and took it seriously. I took longer to act and gave more respect to the players and the cards i was prepared to play. I guess what i am saying is, the money was significant. The low limits are a fucking grind and people, including me often play like shit because they can affors to lose. I think i'd rather play a bit higher and give myself a better shot at winning a significant amount of money where i will actually learn something and become a better player.

Sorry for the long post - i doubt you are even reading any more are you??



Just me then....

Duck for dinner, mmmm!

Good luck everyone.